SFX:

Suspense Intro

ANNOUNCER:

Suspense

SFX:

Stinger

ANNOUNCER:

And the producer of radios outstanding theater of thrills, the master of mystery and adventure, William N. Robeson.

ROBESON:

We who are in the business of keeping you in suspense find ourselves in a quandary at this time of the year. The elements of suspense; murder, mayhem, and macabre or mischief, are awkwardly out of place at this festival of peace and love. Yet that first Christmas was full of suspense. It was the problem of lodging for the delicate mother that chill evening when there was no room at the inn. And there was great mystery, when suddenly the star appeared in the east. Finally there was the magnificent climax and happy ending when the three kings of the orient arrived at last bearing gifts of gold and frankincense and myrrh. We feel we cannot improve upon this tail so we will bring you another. Along with our best wishes for a most Merry Christmas. Listen, listen then, as Mr. Raymond Burr stars in Out for Christmas, which begins in just a moment.

COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #1:

Here's actress Joan Bennett

JOAN:

It's terrible to try and act with a dreadful cold. To feel better quickly I take four-way cold tablets the fast way to relieve nasty cold or stress.

COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #1:

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JOAN:

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COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #1:

Four-way tablets 29 and 59 cents

COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #2:

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ANNOUNCER:

And now...

SFX:

Music Up

ANNOUNCER:

Out for Christmas... starring Mr. Raymond Burr. A tale well calculated to keep you in...Suspense!

SFX:

Music Bridge

JOE:

I hadn't figured on being out for Christmas, but my prison record paid off. Takes a lot of good behavior to knock time off an armed robbery and assault rap but I was a good boy, model prisoner. I took everything they threw at me with a, not exactly with a smile, I don't smile much. But I took it without griping, so I'm out for Christmas. And Christmas is as good a time as any for what I got to do. (Pause let music come up)

SFX:

Music Changes to holiday background (Jingle Bells, etc)

JOE:

The town looked cruddy, they got phony tin Christmas trees on the lamp posts along the main drag in colored lights all over the joint and Christmas carols screeching at you from loudspeakers everywhere. Even the saloons have red and green streamers all over the place, and the bar mirrors all frosted like snow. And a big bowl of slop called Tom and Jerry their pushing.

SOUND:

(People Laughing, enjoying)

BARTENDER:

Merry Christmas

JOE:

Yeah

BARTENDER:

What will it be a little Christmas cheer a hot Tom and Jerry maybe?

JOE:

Don't you got any whiskey?

BARTENDER:

Oh sure we got whiskey

JOE:

Give me a straight shot

BARTENDER:

Ok

JOE:

Can't you get anything on that jukebox but them Christmas carols?

BARTENDER:

What's the matter don't you like carols?

JOE:

No, they stink

BARTENDER:

You won't think so after you get a couple of drinks under your belt

JOE:

You think so?

BARTENDER:

Sure, it's Christmas man.

JOE:

Yeah, So I heard (Takes a drink) That takes good, real good.

BARTENDER:

Say you look sort of familiar, don't I know you from someplace?

JOE:

I was wondering how long it would take

BARTENDER:

Yeah the voice is familiar, your eyes sort of

JOE:

Joe... Joe Watson

BARTENDER:

Joe! I heard you're were going to get out soon. Charlie Jones told me, but I didn't know you'd be out for Christmas.

JOE:

Yeah I got big hearted

BARTENDER:

Hey you put on a little weight, that's why I didn't recognize you

JOE:

30 pounds, prison chow

BARTENDER:

But you look real good Joe, you look real good

JOE:

Yeah, where is Charlie? He been in tonight?

BARTENDER:

Eh not yet, but he'll be around probably

JOE:

Got to see him, you know where he's living at?

BARTENDER:

Yeah he's got a room over on 4th street

JOE:

A room? I figured he'd be living in a flop house

Bartender:

Oh not Charlie, he's been doing ok since he got out. He's got a steady job. How bout you Joe? You got a job lined up?

JOE:

Yeah... I gotta job lined up

BARTENDER:

A good job?

JOE:

It will be good... as good as I can make it

SFX:

Music Up

COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #1:

Has the last minute shopping really got you down? Are you dashing and prancing all over the town. You bought a lot of presents but still got lots to go, well

FEMALE SINGER:

Go go go get a scripto

COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #1:

You don't have to know a size you don't worry about the fit. A scripto pen or pencil always makes a hit. For mom or dad or sister, aunt Jean or uncle Joe

FEMALE SINGER:

Go go go get a scripto... Go go go get a scripto... get a scripto

COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #1:

Here's the easy convenient way to finish all your Christmas shopping in a matter of minutes. With scripto pens and pencils available at stores everywhere. All scriptos costing a dollar or more are handsomely gift boxed, see the famous scripto satellite, the satellite out writes any pen you have ever used. Costs only $1.95. Enjoy one stop gift shopping.

FEMALE SINGER:

Go go go get a scripto.

COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #1:

Give the scripto

FEMALE SINGER:

Scripto

ANNOUNCER:

And now, starring Mr. Raymond Burr. Act 2 of "Out for Christmas"

SFX:

Music Interlude

JOE:

They even had this room in the house where Charlie was staying loused up for Christmas. There was a poinsettia at the door and red and green lights in the landladies window. Charlie's room was on the fourth floor in the back.

SFX:

Knocking, door opens

CHARLIE:

Joe

JOE:

Yeah

CHARLIE:

So they let you out for Christmas

JOE:

Yeah

CHARLIE:

Well come on in, hahaha gee it's good to see you Joe

SFX:

Electric Train Noises (Whistle, wheels on tracks)

JOE:

Good to see you Charlie... hey what the, what do you got there

CHARLIE:

Oh that's a electric train, just a minute I'll turn it off

JOE:

Electric train what for

CHARLIE:

Oh my sister's kid, that's all he talks about for Christmas an electric train, heh. So I got him one at a discount at the place where I work but I wanted to see if it works ok, you know how it is.

JOE:

Yeah... so what's the idea of the Christmas tree?

CHARLIE:

Well living by myself and all I thought I'd have my, my own tree. It's just a little one.

JOE:

You lost your marbles?

CHARLIE:

Well it's Christmas, Joe.

JOE:

(Laughing) Guys in cell block 4 oughta see you now playing with electric trains into your own Christmas tree.

CHARLIE:

I bet they'd like to be doing the same thing.

JOE:

Not me... did you check up on Malloy like I asked you to?

CHARLIE:

Yeah, yes he's still on the police force.

JOE:

Good, you gotta gun?

CHARLIE:

No no, I don't have no use for guns anymore.

JOE:

You know where I can get one?

CHARLIE:

Well, Sure, I guess I could locate one.

JOE:

Well I told you to in my last letter I told you, get a gun for me I said.

CHARLIE:

I know Joe, but look pal, I thought... Well I hoped maybe you would change your mind.

JOE:

Charlie, on the day he testified against me, I swore I'd get him. His testimony did it you know, that's what convicted me, he sent me out.

CHARLIE:

(Interrupting) He had to testify the way he did.

JOE:

He didn't have to be so convincing.

CHARLIE:

But Joe what good will it do? You'll only get the chair.

JOE:

Nah, I'm not afraid of the chair. I seen enough of life that stinks. I ain't in love with it, I just assume leave it as long I can take that rat with me.

CHARLIE:

But it ain't only him Joe.

JOE:

What do you mean?

CHARLIE:

He's married now.

JOE:

Are you kidding? What kind of a dizzy broad would want him.

CHARLIE:

You ain't gonna like this Joe.

JOE:

Ain't gonna like what?

CHARLIE:

The dizzy broad that married him is Lucille.

JOE:

Lucille... My Lucille.

CHARLIE:

That's right, I'm sorry Joe.

JOE:

Funny... yeah it's real funny. She wrote me she couldn't wait for me no longer, you remember when I got the letter.

CHARLIE:

I remember.

JOE:

She didn't say who it was, she never answered my letters after that. Oh that lousy double crossing.

CHARLIE:

You weren't up for 10 to 20, Joe.

JOE:

Yeah, I guess she never counted on me making it in 8. With time off for good behavior.

CHARLIE:

Well 8 years is a long time for a young girl to wait Joe.

JOE:

Mike Malloy is a fine guy to throw me over for... Well, it makes a dandy... Double dandy... It will be a pleasure to kill them both.

CHARLIE:

Oh how can you talk that way Joe, well it's Christmas

JOE:

Christmas is for people who don't know no better. Kids and idiots.

CHARLIE:

Come on Joe listen to me, forget about Malloy and Lucille. You got a chance to make a new life for yourself. Like I'm doing. I can get you a job where I'm working, I'm sure I can.

JOE:

What are you doing?

CHARLIE:

I'm Santa Claus in the toy department at brighton's department store.

JOE:

Ain't no future in that, your gonna be out of work the day after tomorrow.

CHARLIE:

No I'm not, they promised to keep me on.

JOE:

Doing what, minding the reindeer?

CHARLIE:

Mr. Brighton believes in giving guys like us a chance. That's why I'm sure you can get a job there. You come down tomorrow and talk to him.

JOE:

I'll talk to him after Christmas.

CHARLIE:

Hey hey how about coming over to my sisters house for Christmas dinner the day after tomorrow.

JOE:

Yeah... I might even do that.

CHARLIE:

Good, Joe there ain't no sense in carrying the hatred around in your heart especially around Christmas time. So let Malloy and Lucille have their Christmas in peace.

JOE:

Oh they will have their Christmas alright. Their last Christmas.

CHARLIE:

But then it will be your last one too.

JOE:

Eh I just got it figured different. Nevermind the gun I will get my own gun tomorrow. But there is one thing I want from you.

CHARLIE:

What's that Joe?

JOE:

Tomorrow night, I want to borrow your Santa Claus suit.

SFX:

Music Up

(Tums Commercial with Music)

 

COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #2:

Holiday hustle make you queasy, stomach nervous and uneasy. Then

FEMALE SINGER:

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COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #2:

Yes during the busy bustling season, get quick relief from annoying acid indigestion, always carry Tums 10 cents. 3 roll pack a quarter. Or get the new 6 roll back with free metal carrier 49 cents.

ANNOUNCER:

And now

SFX:

Stinger

ANNOUNCER:

Starring Mr. Raymond Burr, act 3 of Out for Christmas.

Music Up (Oh come all ye faithful)

JOE:

Next day I did my Christmas shopping for a gun. That night I wrapped Charlie's Santa Claus suit into a bundle, took a bus out to the subdivision where Malloy and Lucille had a house. I ducked into an alley behind a supermarket and put on the red suit whiskers and all. It was gonna be so easy I had to laugh. You couldn't want a better disguise on Christmas eve... for murder.

SFX:

Stinger followed by Christmas music

JOE:

I didn't have any trouble finding the house, little box of a house like all of the others on the street. Decorated with colored lights like all of the others. Nobody saw me, even if they had who has a better right then Santa Claus to be on the streets Christmas eve... Gun felt cold in my pocket as I closed my fist around it, pushed the bell.

SFX:

Door bell (sounding jingle bells)

JOE:

Even it was wired for Christmas.

SFX:

Door Opens

LUCILLE:

Yes

JOE:

Merry Christmas

LUCILLE:

Why (chuckling) it's Santa Claus!

JOE:

Aren't you gonna ask me in?

LUCILLE:

Well my husband isn't home yet.

JOE:

That's alright, I'll come in and wait for him.

LUCILLE:

I don't understand.

JOE:

You don't believe in Santa Claus anymore, Lucille? You oughta.

LUCILLE:

Who are you?

JOE:

Don't you recognize my voice?

LUCILLE:

You, you sound like...

JOE:

Joe?

LUCILLE:

Oh no

JOE:

Good old Joe, you were gonna wait for me. No matter how long it took.

LUCILLE:

Joe I thought -

JOE:

(Interrupts) In the cooler for keep,s uh uh, I told you I'd come back for ya. Here I am.

LUCILLE:

Well you're too late Joe.

JOE:

Yeah so I hear... how come you didn't wait Lucille?
LUCILLE: I... I fell in love

JOE:

With the guy who sent me to prison, a no good cop.

LUCILLE:

He didn't send you to prison Joe, you were guilty. 13

JOE:

I would have beaten the rap if he wouldn't have testified the way he did

LUCILLE:

He had to testify that way he was only telling the truth.

JOE:

Yeah so he could get me out of the way and steal my girl.

LUCILLE:

Joe you got things all twisted. It all happened afterwards I only met him at your trial we fell in love afterwards.

JOE:

When I couldn't protect myself.

LUCILLE:

Oh Joe, I'm sorry. It just happened.

JOE:

You're telling me, Where is the fuzz.

LUCILLE:

Who?

JOE:

The copper, your old man.

LUCILLE:

He's still on duty.

JOE:

Working overtime to put the arm on some stiff on Christmas Eve, when will he be home?

LUCILLE:

I expect him anytime now.

JOE:

Good, I am going to be glad to see him.

LUCILLE:

Why would you hate him so.

JOE:

You see I promised him something... didn't he ever tell you?

LUCILLE:

No

JOE:

I promised to kill him when I got out

LUCILLE:

Joe!

JOE:

Tonight's the night Lucille.

LUCILLE:

What do you mean Joe... you've got a gun

JOE:

Sure I gotta gun... and I'm gonna use it... on both of you.

LUCILLE:

Both of us?

JOE:

You both double crossed me... I could kill you first but I think I'll wait til your old man comes home. It's ought to be interesting to see how he acts, I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if he tried to make a deal with me.

LUCILLE:

A deal?

JOE:

Yeah like shoot my wife and let me go free.

LUCILLE:

Joe, what a terrible thing to say.

JOE:

You'll see what kind of a creep you married.

LUCILLE:

Joe do it then, but do it cause I asked you. Kill me and let him go.

JOE:

Ahhh I come to get you both... I'm gonna get you both, Together. Ahhem, how bout some music while we are waiting. Turn on the radio.

LUCILLE:

Ahhh

JOE:

Go on, turn it on! (angry)...

SFX:

Click radio comes on Christmas Music

JOE:

He, he makes you happy Lucy?

LUCILLE:

Ya Joe, Very.

JOE:

You made him happy?

LUCILLE:

I hope so.

JOE:

That's nice... cause tonight your both gonna make me happy. By becoming very dead.

SFX:

Jingle Bells being played

LUCILLE:

It's too Loud

LUCY:

Crying

JOE:

What's that?

LUCILLE:

Little Lucy, the radio woke her.

JOE:

You got kids?

LUCILLE:

Yeah

JOE:

Where are you going?

LUCILLE:

I have to look in on her and quiet her

JOE:

Don't try nothing funny I'll be right behind you.

LUCILLE:

There now honey, there there. Alright Alright, Mommy just turned on the radio too loud.

LUCY:

You scared me Mommy.

LUCILLE:

Aww

LUCY:

Mommie, look behind you it's Santa Claus.

LUCILLE:

Yes, yes it's Santa Claus.

LUCY:

Mikey wake up, Mikey look it's Santa Claus.

MIKEY:

Santa Claus, Santa Claus, I want to see Santa Claus.

SFX:

Stinger

Commercial Announcer #1:

Looking for quality entertainment without the high prices and long lines, then the Riverside Township Radio Players need to be your new year's resolution. For 20 years, the players have entertained audiences bringing old time radio to life. From comedy to drama, science fiction to westerns, the Radio Players perform a variety of shows from radio's golden age. Make sure you save January 25th, February 22nd, March 22nd, April 26th, and May 17th in your new year's calendar for Radio Theater at the Riverside Township Hall. 7:30 p.m. is always the start time and feel free to invite a friend or two. All of the information can be found at riversidetownshipradioplayers.com or if you are on Twitter follow @radioplayers for updates. You can even listen to past performances through Youtube by searching Riverside Township Radio Players and subscribing to our channel. Thanks for celebrating 20 years with us and our sincere wishes for a safe and joyous holiday season.

ANNOUNCER:

And Now... starring Mr. Raymond Burr, Act 4 of Out for Christmas.

SFX:

Music (Oh Come All Ye Faithful in background)

JOE:

I had time to jam the gun back into my pocket before those two kids were wide awake and all over me grabbing at my red suit, pulling at my phony whiskers and pushing me into a chair.

LUCY:

Did you bring us presents Santa Claus? Did you? Where's your reindeer Santa?

JOE:

Can you get rid of these kids

LUCY:

What did you do with your reindeer Santa?

JOE:

Well their their parked outside Mikey, up on a roof

LUCY:

They are gonna come down the chimney?

JOE:

Oh yeah, sure.

LUCY:

Why aren't your clothes dirty?

MIKEY:

Didn't the fire burn you?

JOE:

Well, no... see it's an asbestos suit. Now, now listen, you kids should go back to bed.

LUCY:

Oh No

MIKEY:

No no Santa please we want our presents.

LUCY:

We want to see your reindeer.

JOE:

You gotta get them off me.

(Kids are begging Santa to stay)

 

LUCILLE:

Their so excited Joe they've never seen Santa Claus before.

JOE:

I'm not Santa Claus.

LUCILLE:

To them you are.

JOE:

Yeah

LUCY:

Santa Claus?

JOE:

What

LUCY:

I want to kiss you.

SFX:

Kiss

MIKEY:

Me Too, Me Too.

SFX:

Kiss

JOE:

Ah darn, alright you two kids now listen to me.

LUCY:

Ok Santa Claus, I'm listening.

MIKEY:

Me Too

JOE:

You've gotta go back to bed now .

MIKEY:

Well I want my presents.

LUCY:

Me Too

JOE:

You'll, you'll get your presents in the morning when you wake up, they'll be there under the tree.

LUCY:

You Promise?

JOE:

I promise... Now you run off to bed... on the account of I gotta get going... you wouldn't want the other boys and girls to miss their presents cause I've, I've been goofing off with you would you?

LUCY:

Oh no, that wouldn't be fair.

JOE:

Well Alright then, off to bed you go.

LUCY:

Alright... Come on Mikey, Merry Christmas Santa Claus.

MIKEY:

Merry Christmas Santa.

JOE:

Yeah... Merry Christmas kids... and good night

LUCY:

Goodnight... Come on Mikey.

LUCILLE:

Oh Joe, they'll never forget that.

JOE:

Yeah... neither will I (very low)

SFX:

Door Opens

MIKE MALLOY:

Merry Christmas honey, sorry I am late... Hey what's this?

LUCILLE:

It, it's Joe Watson, Mike.

MIKE MALLOY:

Joe Watson? What the devil are you doing here?

LUCILLE:

He came to kill us.

MIKE MALLOY:

What?

JOE:

Take it easy Mike... here, here's my gun.

LUCILLE:

You changed your mind?

JOE:

Ehh, Well your kids changed my mind.

LUCILLE:

They thought he was really Santa Claus darling, they were so excited.

JOE:

Well Mike, you can send me up again... better to go back for parole violation I guess then for murder.

MIKE:

Oh uh, wait a minute... we gotta have a complaining witness... you want to make a complaint, Lucille?

LUCILLE:

No Mike, I want to thank Joe for giving the kids the best Christmas of their lives.

MIKE:

Well I haven't any complaint then... Merry Christmas Joe.

JOE:

Eh I still say Christmas is for people who don't know no better... like kids and idiots... yeah... Merry Christmas.

SFX:

Oh Come all ye Faithful concludes

ANNOUNCER:

Suspense

SFX:

Stinger

ANNOUNCER:

In which Raymond Burr starred in Out for Christmas. Written, Produced, and Directed by William N. Robeson. In just a moment the names of the supporting players and a word about next week's story of suspense.

COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER #2:

Christmas Eve on CBS radio. Bing Crosby invites you to celebrate Christmas with the world on our fourth annual Christmas sing with Bing. With Bing as your guide and CBS radio as your magic carpet, you'll visit Rome to hear the vatican choir. There too you'll hear the sound of the bells of St. Peter's as they ring for the holiday mass. On our Christmas sing with Bing, you'll visit New York and Salt Lake City. Canada, Australia, Holland, France, even places like Hawaii, Alaska, and the Fiji Islands, where carolers and choirs will be waiting to sing the traditional Christmas songs with you. To add to the excitement this year Mrs. Bing Crosby, Katherine Grant, will be at her husband's side. Whether you spend Christmas eve at home or out on the highway heading for a holiday destination, join us right here on CBS radio as most of these same stations present our fourth annual Christmas sing with Bing.

ANNOUNCER:

Supporting Raymond Burr in Out for Christmas were Joan Banks, Lillian Byhef, Charles Seal, Carl Swinson, Howard McNeer, and Dick Beals. Listen, Listen again next week when we return with Mr. Frank Lovejoy starring in the 32nd of December, another tale well calculated to keep you in...

SFX:

Stinger

ANNOUNCER:

Suspense... This is the CBS radio network

Theme music fades out