MUSIC:

"ON STAGE" THEME UP, THEN PAUSE FOR:

ANNCR:

Cathy and Elliott Lewis - On Stage.

MUSIC:

"ON STAGE" THEME SWELLS, AND CONTINUES UNDER

ANNCR:

Cathy Lewis. Elliott Lewis. Two of the most distinguished names in Radio. Appearing each week, in their own theatre. Starring in a repertory of transcribed stories of their own, and your, choosing. Radio's foremost players in Radio's foremost plays.

MUSIC:

OUT

ANNCR:

Ladies and gentlemen, Elliott Lewis.

ELLIOTT:

Good evening. May I present my wife, Cathy.

CATHY:

Good evening.

ELLIOTT:

In the dictionary, "crustacean" is defined as "belonging to, or characteristic of, the crustacea; an individual of the crustacea".

CATHY:

And "crustacea" is defined as "one of the three primary divisions or classes into which annulose animals provided with articulated limbs are divided. The higher forms of this class include lobsters, shimps, crawfish, and so forth. The lower animals are of varied forms, as barnacles, wood lice, fish lice, and so forth."

ELLIOTT:

And the word comes from the Latin "crusta", meaning "the hard shell of a body; the rind".

CATHY:

And from all of this, E. Jack Newman has written a new radio play which we are about to do for you, called "The Crustacean".

MUSIC:

POWERFUL, PLODDING, MAJESTIC, UP, THEN OUT

SFX:

POLICE STATION AMBIENCE. TELETYPE MACHINES IN BACKGROUND, UNDER

SFX:

OFFICE DOOR CLOSES

(FOLEY IS SLOW, SIMPLE-MINDED, WITH CHILDLIKE INNOCENCE, LIKE LENNY IN "OF MICE & MEN". VIC IS A COP, TREATING FOLEY GENTLY, AS IF FOLEY'S A CHILD.)

 

VIC:

Hello, Foley.

FOLEY:

What's that thing out there?

VIC:

Huh? Oh, it's a teletype machine.

FOLEY:

What's it for?

VIC:

It prints news.

FOLEY:

I seen lotsa things. I guess I ain't never seen one o' them before.

VIC:

Do you remember me, Foley?

FOLEY:

Look, none o' you people, none o' ya gonna wanna listen to what I tell ya. So I won't tell ya. That's how I feel about it.

SFX:

CREAK OF OFFICE CHAIR

VIC:

I might listen, Foley. Why don'tcha try me?

FOLEY:

You won't listen. You wouldn't, and nobody else would.

VIC:

(SIGHS) Foley...

FOLEY:

What?

VIC:

We've talked before.

FOLEY:

Oh, yeah. We talked. We have, huh? We talked before about maybe do you have a match so's I can light up? Or do I have a match so's you can light up? But we never really talk, you an' me.

VIC:

We had coffee together in the kitchen.

FOLEY:

Nobody's ever wanted to talk to me to see if maybe I had something to say about something. Why, I just know your name's Vic, and that's about all.

VIC:

My name's Victor Hanley.

FOLEY:

Yeah. Well, I bet you don't know my name, outside o' just Foley.

VIC:

Your name is Joseph Willis Foley.

FOLEY:

How did you know that?

VIC:

I asked Mr. Washburn. He told me.

FOLEY:

He did, huh? Well, I forgot about him. He pays me my check, so I guess he had to know. Sure, I get it now. That Social Security stuff, where they take part o' my poke every week. Wash 'd know my name all right. But he never wanna know it. He had to on account o' government. Wash never calls me anything but Foley. He never said to me, "Hullo, Joe," when he come inna kitchen. I'm Foley to everybody around. Just plain Foley. Nuts.

VIC:

Joe...

SFX:

CREAK OF OFFICE CHAIR

VIC:

Joe?

FOLEY:

What? You talkin' to me?

VIC:

Yeah. You just told me no one ever called you by anything but your last name. I'm gonna call you Joe from now on. Would you like that?

FOLEY:

Sure.

VIC:

Joe, you're right when you say we haven't talked about many things since we've known each other. I'd drop into the hotel now and then, and say Hello, and that's about all. But that doesn't mean we... haven't been friends in a way. Now, have I ever done anything to you? Have I ever hurt you?

FOLEY:

No.

VIC:

And you've never done anything to me. Okay? And then, what's to stop us from talking right now? Would you like one o' my cigarettes, Joe?

FOLEY:

Tailor-mades?

VIC:

Yeah.

FOLEY:

Sure. Why not? Gimme one.

SFX:

CREAK OF OFFICE CHAIR

SFX:

VIC STRIKES A MATCH, AND LIGHTS FOLEY'S CIGARETTE. FOLEY TAKES A DRAG, AND EXHALES.

VIC:

Joe... Are these yours?

SFX:

PUTS BUNDLE OF PAGES ON DESK

FOLEY:

Where'd you get them?

VIC:

Your room. You make them yourself?

FOLEY:

Yeah.

VIC:

They look very interesting, Joe. Some kind of colour charts, are they?

SFX:

SPREADING OUT PAGES

VIC:

Joe, I'd like to know what all these cardboard sheets mean. Would you tell me about them? I understand you work pretty hard on them.

FOLEY:

Where'd you hear that?

VIC:

From people at the hotel. They told me you spend a lot o' time on them, all your spare time. Is that right?

FOLEY:

What's it to you?

VIC:

Would you explain them to me, Joe? I'd like to know.

FOLEY:

Them's my ideas.

VIC:

Your ideas, Joe? In-- in colour?

FOLEY:

Yeah. You know much about colours?

VIC:

M-m, not a thing, Joe.

FOLEY:

Colours is important in life.

VIC:

How do you mean, Joe?

FOLEY:

You take your green. Now, that's just about the best colour there is. So, if you got green, you got something. But if you got, say, purple, you got maybe lotsa trouble. I got it all writ down there.

VIC:

In all the years you worked at San Odana Inn, you-- you never told Mr. Washburn or the cook or any of the others about these ideas you have? You never showed them this?

FOLEY:

That's my business. A guy can keep his business if he wants.

VIC:

Of course, Joe. Now, when did you first--

SFX:

SLIGHT CREAK OF OFFICE CHAIR

FOLEY:

Say... You wanna talk to me any more, Vic?

VIC:

Yes, Joe.

FOLEY:

Then why do you keep askin' questions? I'm talkin' to ya. I'm tellin' ya about things, and ya keep askin' questions. You let me tell it to ya, will ya?

VIC:

Sit down, Joe.

SFX:

CREAK OF OFFICE CHAIR

FOLEY:

You're a pretty nice fella, I guess. But... you're like a lotta other guys. You wanna rush a guy when he's thinking. No guy wants to be rushed, don'tcha know that?

VIC:

You just take your time, Joe. I'll listen.

FOLEY:

Sure. You'll listen now, cause you an' them other guys out there in the other room, you know I'm right, now.

VIC:

We don't know that for sure, Joe.

FOLEY:

Well... it don't make no difference to me, cause I know.

MUSIC:

WISTFUL, UNDER

FOLEY:

No guy can say I ever tried to sail. I always do my job, wherever I am. Muckin', fryin', diggin', no matter what. And I stick to my own business, like at the hotel. Pay no mind to nobody. I just do my job.

SFX:

TELETYPE OUT

MUSIC:

SUDDENLY DRAMATIC, THEN OUT

SFX:

DOOR SLAM. RESTAURANT KITCHEN AMBIENCE, UNDER

WASH:

You write your orders at the table, then hang the check on this hook here for the chef. Then you take your makeup back out in the dining room.

(ELLIE IS HARDBOILED, COLD, REPTILIAN--SHE GETS HER KICKS TORMENTING WEAK CREATURES.)

 

ELLIE:

Swell.

WASH:

Water, napkins, silverware.

ELLIE:

Okay.

WASH:

Coffee over there. Cream and sugar outside. Anybody wants tea, use that urn. The tanks always full o' hot water. These are your teabags right here.

ELLIE:

What else?

WASH:

That's about it. You start at six tonight. Off at twelve. Oh, uh, (CALLS) Foley? Foley?

FOLEY:

Uh?

WASH:

Come 'ere! Foley can tell ya anything else you wanna know about the kitchen.

SFX:

FOLEY WALKS TO KITCHEN. SWINGING DOORS OPEN & CLOSE

FOLEY:

What's up, Mr. Washburn?

WASH:

This is Ellie. New waitress.

ELLIE:

(BORED) Hiya.

FOLEY:

Hello.

WASH:

Foley here has worked for us for a long time.

ELLIE:

Well.

FOLEY:

Oh, yeah. Me an' Mr. Washburn been pals a long time now, ain't we?

WASH:

(WARMLY) Oh, we sure have, Foley.

MAN:

(FROM DINING ROOM) Mr. Washburn? May I see you for a moment please?

WASH:

Sure! (TO FOLEY & ELLIE) I'll be right back.

SFX:

HE WALKS OUT TO DINING ROOM. SWINGING DOORS OPEN & CLOSE

ELLIE:

So, you an' Washtub's been pals a long time, huh?

FOLEY:

Oh, yeah, yeah. We sure have.

ELLIE:

M-hm. Just like that, I'll bet.

FOLEY:

Yeah.

ELLIE:

I didn't think a bird who offered twenty a week and tips had many friends.

FOLEY:

Ya get your board an' room too, dont'cha?

ELLIE:

Yeah. What's he pay you, a thousand a day?

FOLEY:

I get me fifty a month an' my bed an' beans. Pretty nice set-up.

ELLIE:

Does anybody ever come to this dump?

FOLEY:

Oh, lotsa people.

ELLIE:

Looks pretty dead to me. Tell me, whattaya do for laughs?

FOLEY:

Hm?

ELLIE:

What's for fun, fifty miles from nowhere out here?

FOLEY:

Oh, lots to do.

ELLIE:

You know, when I walked in here a second ago, I saw you standin' there in your apron and underwear top, and I said to myself, "Ellie," I said, "A tall boy givin' those pots all he's worth, now there's a boy." I said, "There's a boy who really knows how to get out and live it up." I could tell it just by lookin' at you. Yes, sir, I'll bet you got a Cadillac somewhere, huh? You got a Cadillac?

FOLEY:

No, I ain't got me no Cadillac. What's that?

ELLIE:

Skip it. Wha'd he say your name was?

FOLEY:

Foley.

ELLIE:

Well... I'm stuck here for the summer, Foley, ol' kid, so I know you an' me are gonna have a lot o' dandy times together, huh?

FOLEY:

Oh, yeah, yeah. We sure are, Ellie.

SFX:

SWINGING DOORS OPEN AND CLOSE

WASH:

Come on, Ellie. I'll show you your room.

MUSIC:

SLIGHTLY OPTIMISTIC, TURNING TO OMINOUS, UNDER

FOLEY:

Me an' Ellie didn't have no dandy times together. I only seen her when we was working. I didn't figure on it. A guy knows what's what. I knew about her, like I say. From the first. A guy knows what's what. Yes, sir.

SFX:

CREAK OF BEDSPRINGS

ELLIE:

Hiya.

FOLEY:

Hey. What's this? What's the idea?

ELLIE:

What's what idea?

FOLEY:

You sittin' there. Whadayou doin' in my room?

ELLIE:

(STRETCHES) Well, I'll tell ya. I'm waitin' for you; that's one thing I'm doin'. For another thing, I had my choice of sittin' outside in the sun or waitin' in here, so I just walked in and sat down. You wanna fight a duel about it?

FOLEY:

What you want, Ellie?

ELLIE:

Washtub said you had the keys to the linen closet. I want some napkins. Now, work on that a while, Speedy.

SFX:

JINGLE OF RING OF KEYS

FOLEY:

Oh, I'll-- I'll take you over to the linen closet.

ELLIE:

Why don'tcha just gimme the keys? I'll go myself. Or dont'cha figure I got enough brains to unlock the door myself?

FOLEY:

No one but me's supposed to have the keys, Ellie.

ELLIE:

Okay, okay. What's that pile o' stuff you brought in?

FOLEY:

Nothin'.

SFX:

FLIPPING THROUGH PAGES

ELLIE:

Looks like you been doing some printin', Foley. I didn't know you could print.

FOLEY:

I went to school, four years maybe.

ELLIE:

(SNEERING) What is it, your life story?

FOLEY:

Don't-- don't touch it.

ELLIE:

I just asked ya. I'm only tryin' to make a little polite conversation with ya, but if it's too much for ya to handle, forget it.

FOLEY:

Well... Them's my writin'.

ELLIE:

How to scrub a pot, in one easy lesson?

FOLEY:

It's my writin' on colour. You ever dream, Ellie?

ELLIE:

Yeah. Why?

FOLEY:

What colours you see when you dream?

ELLIE:

I dunno. What colours am I supposed to see?

FOLEY:

Colours that mean something. All of 'em do. Something good...or bad. Like, uh, colour tells ya if you're gonna be sick or well, or if you're gonna go someplace, or if you're gonna... get a new job maybe. I got it all worked out.

ELLIE:

Fortune-tellin', huh?

FOLEY:

More'n that.

ELLIE:

This come from a book or somethin'?

FOLEY:

No. It's my own idea. I had it a long time.

ELLIE:

How did that happen?

FOLEY:

Well... I been knockin' around plenty in my time, bummin' an' workin'. An' I seen plenty o' things. Guys drunk, guys killed. I knowed about 'em from their colours. I knowed about lotsa people on account o' their colours. You take a guy, an' you look at him, an' you wonder what he can do. Can he maybe plane a piece o' wood better'n any guy alive? Or maybe can he roll makin's better'n any guy? Every guy can do something in life, see? Every guy's got some reason for bein' here. Well... a long time went by before I knew why I was here. And then I figured out these colours. That's what I can do.

ELLIE:

(LIKE A CAT CORNERING A MOUSE) Well, my, my. You been writin' it down, huh?

FOLEY:

Yeah. I ain't never told anybody.

ELLIE:

That's smart. Keep it to yourself. I'll just bet my last million buckaroos you've got life all figured out there. And you're just the kid who'd know all about it. Yes, sir.

FOLEY:

You're makin' fun o' me. Aint'cha?

ELLIE:

Why, no! Why, whatever gave you that idea, Einstein?

FOLEY:

Don't make no fun of a guy. Don't ever make no fun of a guy, Ellie.

ELLIE:

(CHUCKLES, THEN ERUPTS IN LOUD, MOCKING LAUGHTER)

MUSIC:

STIRRING, A BIT DISCHORDANT, ENDING ON DRAMATIC STING

ANNCR:

You are listening to Cathy and Elliott Lewis - On Stage. Tonight's play: "The Crustacean".

(PSA) All of us, at some time, are faced with a challenge. The man in uniform is no exception. Many is the time, for example, when he is called upon to demonstrate his peacetime value and importance to the civillian population of the United States. During 1954, the New England coast was hit by an unexpected and highly damaging hurricane. Not long after the storm passed, the men of the US Naval Base at Newport, Rhode Island, went into action. It supplied portable generators to provide emergency electrical power for three hospitals, a newspaper, two dairies, and an entire city. It provided a one-thousand-watt generator to enable a radio station in Newport to resume broadcasting. And, when a serious fire broke out in Newport, the Navy base furnished a fire engine and twenty-five-hundred feet of hose. It also sent pumping equipment to nearby Portsmouth, and the portable floodlighting unit to the Providence Post Office; as well as helicopter surveillance teams over several devastated areas. And, in order to prevent rioting and looting as an aftermath of the hurricane, the Navy assigned one-hundred-five shore patrolmen to assist local police in four Rhode Island communities. As long as their help was needed, the Navy men gave unselfishly of their time and equipment. Yes, by their aid and assistance, the Military once more successfully met a challenge.

MUSIC:

DRAMATIC, ENDING ON SUSTAINED DRAMATIC NOTE

SFX:

POLICE STATION, WITH TELETYPE MACHINES IN BACKGROUND, UNDER

FOLEY:

Hey? Can I have a glass o' water?

VIC:

Oh, here, Joe.

SFX:

POURS A GLASS OF WATER, AND GIVES IT TO FOLEY.

FOLEY:

I'm pretty dry. (DRINKS IT IN ONE GULP)

SFX:

PUTS DOWN THE GLASS

VIC:

Joe, uh...

FOLEY:

What?

VIC:

Joe, I've-- I tried to make some of this out. It isn't too clear.

FOLEY:

Everybody's got a colour that belongs to 'em.

VIC:

Oh, well, I got that much. But is the colour in, say, the clothes they wear, or...?

FOLEY:

You don't unnerstand. That isn't it at all.

VIC:

I'm trying to understand, Joe. Joe, I'd like you to tell me more, so I can understand what's in here.

FOLEY:

Yeah.

VIC:

A few minutes ago, you said that everything you know about colours is right. Well, I told you that I wasn't too certain about that. I want to know for sure, one way or the other.

MUSIC:

TENSE, RISING UNDER

FOLEY:

I ain't made no mistake about that there. I thought I did once't, on account'a Ellie, but I didn't. I was right, from the beginning, when I first seen her.

MUSIC:

BIG, DRAMATIC, ENDING ON HANGING NOTE, SEGUES INTO FOLEY WHISTLING IT, UNDER

ELLIE:

(CALLING) Foley? Hey, Foley!

SFX:

ELLIE WALKS TO HIM, UNDER

ELLIE:

Hey, dream boy, can'tcha hear any more?

FOLEY:

(STOPS WHISTLING) I can hear all right.

ELLIE:

What'sa matter? You sore at me?

FOLEY:

Let me alone. I'm busy.

ELLIE:

Aw, there's no rush about anything, Foley.

SFX:

FOLEY STARTS WHISTLING AGAIN

ELLIE:

The dining room's closed; I can see you've been at it like the little ol' beaver with a load on. (STRETCHES) Ugh. I wouldn't stay around this dump for a minute if the tips weren't so good. We had a houseful tonight.

FOLEY:

Did ya laugh at any of 'em?

ELLIE:

Why, you are sore. But you're kind of a wiseacre too, aren't ya?

FOLEY:

I mind my own business.

ELLIE:

How is the pot and pan business, ol' boy?

FOLEY:

(STRETCHES) Never mind.

SFX:

HE STARTS TO WALK AWAY

ELLIE:

Or maybe I should be askin' you about the colour business?

SFX:

HE STOPS, THEN PICKS UP GARBAGE PAIL, AND TAKES IT OUT TO DUMP IT.

SFX:

SCREEN DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES. SHE FOLLOWS HIM OUT. CRICKETS CHIRPING, AS HE DUMPS GARBAGE PAIL, UNDER

ELLIE:

Seein' a lot of life around, these days?

FOLEY:

I don't bother you.

ELLIE:

What'sa matter? You afraid of me? A man like you, who's got so many ideas?

FOLEY:

I wanna finish up.

ELLIE:

You're all finished. Everybody's gone.

FOLEY:

I wanna get by.

SFX:

HE CLIMBS STEPS ONTO PORCH, BUT SHE SHUTS THE DOOR, AND BLOCKS HIM FROM GETTING TO IT.

ELLIE:

Gimme a match first.

FOLEY:

Here.

ELLIE:

Light it for me.

SFX:

HE PUTS DOWN THE EMPTY GARBAGE PAIL, STRIKES A MATCH, AND LIGHTS HER CIGARETTE. SHE INHALES, THEN EXHALES.

FOLEY:

Lemme by, now.

ELLIE:

Why don'tcha have a smoke yourself?

FOLEY:

I don't feel like one.

ELLIE:

Aren'tcha gonna talk to me?

FOLEY:

Got nothin' to talk about.

ELLIE:

Ya had plenty to say this afternoon, all about your ideas.

FOLEY:

I had enough.

ELLIE:

That's too bad. An' I was gonna learn so much.

FOLEY:

You never learnt anything.

ELLIE:

You know what you are? You're a fish.

FOLEY:

Huh?

ELLIE:

You're a crab, maybe a shrimp. You got a shell, just like one of 'em. You a fish?

FOLEY:

I want by.

ELLIE:

Well, come on, kid.

SFX:

HE PICKS UP GARBAGE PAIL, AND STARTS TOWARD DOOR. SHE BLOCKS HIS PATH

ELLIE:

(SEDUCTIVELY) Hi, Foley. Old crab. You ever been this close to a girl before? Maybe we oughtta talk now. I'm anxious to know all about your ideas.

SFX:

HE TRIES TO RUSH PAST HER

ELLIE:

Nah, no, Foley, don't run away.

FOLEY:

I ain't scared o' you.

ELLIE:

Ya act like it. Why would you be scared o' me, Foley?

SFX:

HE DROPS THE EMPTY PAIL

ELLIE:

Ya dropped your bucket.

FOLEY:

Lemme by. Please.

ELLIE:

All right, if ya answer my question, Foley. Ya ever been this close to a girl before? Hm? Have ya?

FOLEY:

(PAUSE) Wash is married. Them guys that deliver things ain't had no time for you. I don't want no part of you either, Ellie.

ELLIE:

(ENRAGED, HITS HIM HARD) Why, you--!

SFX:

HE PICKS UP PAIL

FOLEY:

Now. Lemme get by.

SFX:

HE GOES INSIDE. SCREEN DOOR SLAMS BEHIND HIM.

ELLIE:

(YELLING AFTER HIM) Greasy! That's what ya are! Greasy! You're a greasy dumbell!

MUSIC:

DRAMATIC, UNDER

FOLEY:

I didn't think I'd have much to say to her after that. I mean, I thought I'd stay clear of her. But that wasn't easy, since we were both in the same kitchen. At first, we didn't talk at all, just sorta looked away. But after a day or two, Ellie come over to me.

ELLIE:

We gonna keep this up?

FOLEY:

Keep what up?

ELLIE:

Arguin'.

FOLEY:

Makes no difference to me.

ELLIE:

I wantcha to tell me about the colours, Foley.

FOLEY:

I told ya once before.

ELLIE:

All right, all right, maybe I did try to kid ya. Foley, look, I'm worried, and you're the only one who can help me.

FOLEY:

Yeah...

ELLIE:

I saw a colour last night, for the first time. Can you tell me somethin' about it?

FOLEY:

You'd laugh.

ELLIE:

Not now. It scared me. Listen. What does yellow mean, when ya see it in a dream, Foley?

FOLEY:

You seen yellow?

ELLIE:

Yellow wood, everything painted yellow, real bright.

FOLEY:

Like boxcars? Yellow boxcars?

ELLIE:

Yeah! Yeah, how'd ya know?

FOLEY:

Only way to see yellow.

ELLIE:

Well, say! There is somethin' to this. Tell me what it means! Foley, tell me what it means!

MUSIC:

DRAMATIC, THEN HANGING

FOLEY:

I told her. It wasn't nothin' bad, like she thought. I told her cause I had it all writ down there. Course, I didn't think Ellie'd ever see a colour like yellow. That's a good colour. Then, a coupla days later, she seen some blue, and I told her about that. Then, once, she seen white.

ELLIE:

Bad?

FOLEY:

Pretty good. That means you got some travellin' to do.

ELLIE:

Well, I'll be! You're right! Up until now, I wasn't sure you weren't just handin' me a lotta baloney. I got a letter from my sister today! I'm gonna go to Spokane when I finish here! That settles it.

FOLEY:

What you mean?

ELLIE:

You really got somethin' here, kid! Everything you've told me has been right down the line! It works!

FOLEY:

I know.

ELLIE:

Look, I don't wanna tell you your business, but you oughtta do somethin' about all these ideas you got. You oughtta sell them for money!

FOLEY:

What?

ELLIE:

Sure! Sure! I saw you with a big pile o' paper--things you been writin' down about it-- You oughtta put that in print! It's practically a book!

FOLEY:

Oh, no... I don't write so good.

ELLIE:

You shouldn't let that worry you. You oughtta get-- get it all together, and let some publisher see it.

FOLEY:

My ideas?

ELLIE:

Well, why not? They're good ideas! And we both know they work, don't we? Don't we, Foley?

FOLEY:

I guess we do.

ELLIE:

Well, what are you waitin' for? Get busy!

MUSIC:

DRIVING, FRENETIC, THEN SLOWER, RISING NOTES, UNDER

FOLEY:

That's it, sittin' there. I put in a lotta time on it. Took a lotta time, cause all I had was what I sorta scratched out, but it came out pretty good. An' Ellie said she'd take it with her when she left. She said she had a friend who was a publisher in San Francisco. I guess, maybe I seen it all happen. I mean, me, tellin' people about my ideas.

MUSIC:

DRAMATIC, OMINOUS, ENDING ON SUSTAINED NOTE

SFX:

KNOCKING ON DOOR OF ELLIE'S ROOM

ELLIE:

Come on in!

SFX:

DOOR OPENS

FOLEY:

(EAGER) Hello, Ellie.

ELLIE:

Whaddaya say, Foley?

FOLEY:

Gettin' ready to go, are ya?

ELLIE:

Yep. All I gotta do is close that suitcase, stick on my hat, and I'm off like a dirty shirt. (PAUSE) Whaddaya got there?

FOLEY:

My writin's. Ya remember ya said you'd take it to San Francisco with you?

ELLIE:

I did say that, didn't I? Well, ya can never tell what a girl'l say in a rash moment.

FOLEY:

Huh?

ELLIE:

Let's have a look at it.

SFX:

FLIPPING THROUGH PAGES, UNDER

ELLIE:

Little greasy, isn't it?

FOLEY:

Why, I might'a got it a little dirty.

ELLIE:

Yeah? What's it about?

FOLEY:

What's it about? You know what's it about. You been tellin' me things all along here.

ELLIE:

That stuff about the colours? Foley, ya know there's somethin' else I forgot to tell ya.

FOLEY:

What?

ELLIE:

I never dreamed a colour in my life.

FOLEY:

Huh?

ELLIE:

I never dream, kiddo, just never dream at all. Can ya imagine that?

FOLEY:

But you told me you dreamt yellow. An' then blue an' white; you told me that.

ELLIE:

Ya know what? I was glad to tell you that.

FOLEY:

Huh?

ELLIE:

And I got another little confession to make, sweetheart. I read that trash you got in your hand there. I walked in your room, and I read it a long time ago. Where do you think I got to know so much about your screwy ideas? You want me to quote some of it to ya? Watch out!

SFX:

SCRAPE OF CHAIR ON FLOOR

ELLIE:

Watch it!

FOLEY:

You didn't want me to do anything, 'cept so's you could laugh at me; is that it?

ELLIE:

Well, now, I guess maybe that is it. Yeah, that's it, kiddo. Since we never had many laughs together, I'll do the laughin' for both of us. Why don't you throw that stupid pile o' paper away? It makes about as much sense as you do, standing there.

FOLEY:

You knew all the things I was gonna tell you, ahead o' time...

ELLIE:

Yeah.

FOLEY:

I seen orange, Ellie. I seen it when you first showed here.

ELLIE:

Orange? Well, so what?

FOLEY:

Don't you know what orange means, Ellie? You read this here.

ELLIE:

Now, just a minute, crackpot!

MUSIC:

LIKE SWARMING BEES, RISING, UNDER

FOLEY:

Orange...isn't a good colour. It's bad. Maybe the worst. But then, you told me some other things, so I thought I was wrong. But I see it pretty plain, right now. You didn't wanna listen to me. You never wanna listen to anybody. You never will.

ELLIE:

Get outta here.

FOLEY:

No, Ellie.

MUSIC:

OUT

FOLEY:

I see it better 'n ever now.

SFX:

HE WALKS TO HER

ELLIE:

Listen, you crazy crack-- (MUFFLED CRIES, AS HE COVERS HER MOUTH & NOSE WITH ONE OF HIS HANDS, TO STOP HER TAUNTS)

FOLEY:

(CALMLY) No. No.

SFX:

THEY STRUGGLE. HER MUFFLED CRIES SOON STOP, AND SHE FALLS ONTO THE BED, DEAD.

FOLEY:

(CALMLY) Ellie? Ellie, can you hear me? I seen it when you first walked in.

MUSIC:

OMINOUS, QUIET AT FIRST, BUILDING UNDER

FOLEY:

Orange. Orange. Orange.

MUSIC:

SUDDENLY OUT.

SFX:

POLICE STATION, WITH TELETYPE MACHINES IN BACKGROUND, UNDER

SFX:

CREAK OF OFFICE CHAIR

VIC:

I'm going to look all this over, Joe.

FOLEY:

Yeah, yeah. You do that, Vic. You can tell by them, what I been sayin' is right. I mean, about Ellie.

SFX:

OFFICE DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES. SGT WALKS OVER TO VIC.

SGT:

(QUIETLY) Reporters, Vic. They want to know all about this "colour" angle. Wanna take pictures of the book, and get it in the morning edition.

FOLEY:

What are you fellas whispering about?

VIC:

Oh, just a minute, Joe.

SGT:

(QUIETLY) How 'bout it?

VIC:

(QUIETLY) No. Tell them, No.

SGT:

(QUIETLY) But, Vic, they'll keep hounding us--

VIC:

(QUIETLY) Go out there and tell them, No. The "colour" thing has nothing to do with their stories.

SGT:

(QUIETLY) Okay.

SFX:

SGT WALKS TO DOOR, OPENS IT, EXITS, CLOSES IT

FOLEY:

Hey?

VIC:

What, Joe?

FOLEY:

What happens now?

VIC:

Well, I guess you'll stay here tonight, Joe. Sergeant Bailey'll be back in a minute to take you downstairs.

FOLEY:

I'll sleep here?

VIC:

That's right, Joe.

SFX:

CREAK OF OFFICE CHAIR

FOLEY:

Okay. Okay by me. (PAUSE) Hey, Vic?

VIC:

Mm?

FOLEY:

You got blue.

VIC:

Blue?

FOLEY:

That means you're a pretty nice guy.

MUSIC:

DISCHORDANT, UNDER

FOLEY:

Hey, Vic? How 'bout another one o' them tailor-mades, Vic?

VIC:

(WEARY) Sure, Joe.

SFX:

SLIDES THE PACK TO HIM

MUSIC:

BUILDS TO DRAMATIC FINISH, THEN OUT

ANNCR:

"The Crustacean", starring Cathy and Elliott Lewis - On Stage.

MUSIC:

"ON STAGE" THEME UP, THEN OUT

ELLIOTT:

We were able to be as authentic as it's possible to be in radio, when Larry Thor, who is Detective Danny Clover, in "Broadway Is My Beat", agreed to play Vic the policeman.

CATHY:

And Parley Baer joined us for the first time tonight, to play Wash, who owned the restaurant.

ELLIOTT:

The sound effects that you hear each week On Stage, are performed by two very versatile young men. Their names are Bern Surrey and Ross Murray.

CATHY:

Bern Surrey isn't going to be a sound effects artist much longer, since he's been studying medicine, and soon will have his degree, and open his own practice.

ELLIOTT:

Ross Murray isn't going to be a sound effects artist much longer either, since he's been writing scripts.

CATHY:

And his newest script is what we're going to do next week.

ELLIOTT:

It's called "Penny Ante". It was written by Ross Murray, and it will include sound effects by Ross Murray and almost-Doctor Bern Surrey.

CATHY:

Until next week, thank you for listening. Good night.

ELLIOTT:

Good night.

MUSIC:

ROMANTIC THEME UP, THEN UNDER

ANNCR:

Be sure and join us next week, when "On Stage" returns with Cathy and Elliott Lewis, in another play we know you will enjoy. This has been a United States Armed Forces Radio and Television Service.

MUSIC:

CONTINUES, THEN OUT