CAMPBELL:

Petri Wine brings you --

MUSIC:

THEME (FADE ON CUE)

CAMPBELL:

Basil Rathbone and Nigel Bruce in The New Adventures of Sherlock Holmes!

MUSIC:

THEME (FULL FINISH)

CAMPBELL:

The Petri family -- the family that took time to bring you good wine -- invites you to listen to Doctor Watson tell us about another exciting adventure he shared with his old friend, that master detective, Sherlock Holmes. I hope you've settled back comfortably in a nice cool spot ... And say, if the heat is sort-of getting the best of you, why not mix yourself a tall cool Petri wine-and-soda? Boy, a wine-and-soda is a sure, refreshing way to beat the heat. And it's a delicious way, too, if you make that wine-and-soda with Petri wine. Just in case you've never made a Petri wine-and-soda, all you do is get yourself a tall glass, fill it half-full with your favorite Petri wine -- red or white -- and ice ... and then fill to the top with club soda. It's half Petri wine, half soda, and some ice. And believe me, you've got a frosty, heat-chasing drink with a flavor and a tang that comes right from the heart of those luscious Petri grapes. So next time the thermometer goes up -- Don't frown! Just down a Petri wine-and-soda!

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

CAMPBELL:

And now here we are in Dr. Watson's charming little ranch house, overlooking the blue Pacific. Good evening, Doctor. What story are you planning to tell us about this evening?

WATSON:

Give me time to think, Mr. Campbell. Give me time to think. In the meanwhile, draw up a chair and make yourself comfortable.

CAMPBELL:

Thank you, Doctor.

WATSON:

(THINKING) Now, let me see ... Well ... tonight I think I'll tell you a story that you've often heard me mention by name, although I've never told it before. I call it ... The story of the Lighthouse, the Frightened Politician, and the Trained Cormorant.

CAMPBELL:

Well, well, Doctor -- that's quite an association, isn't it? But ...I don't want to seem ignorant -- just what is a cormorant?

WATSON:

I thought you might ask me that, Mr. Campbell. A cormorant is a bird about the size of a large duck, and the Japanese use them for fishing. You see ... (STOPPING HIMSELF) There I go again. Haven't started my story, and I'm telling you things you'll find out for yourself when you listen to it.

CAMPBELL:

Well, go ahead with your story, Doctor. I'm dying to know how a lighthouse, a bird, and ...

WATSON:

(INTERRUPTING HIM A LITTLE TESTILY) If you'll stop interrupting me, Mr. Campbell, I'll tell you. Well-- It all began on a December night. I remember because a few evenings before, I'd been to see that delightful musical comedy, My Lady Molly. It was one of those nights when it's good to be indoors. The wind was howling and cold stinging rain was beating against the windowpanes. Yes -- it was a good evening to be indoors. Holmes sat moodily at one side of the fireplace, cross-indexing his records of crime, while I, on the other side, was deep in one of Clark Russell's fine sea stories, until the howl of the gale from outside seemed to blend with the text, and the splash of the rain to lengthen out into the long splash of the sea waves. Suddenly the spell was broken. There was the familiar sound of the jangling front bell ....

SOUND EFFECT:

DOORBELL JANGLES (OFF)

WATSON:

(CONTINUING) Who on earth could that be at this time of night?

HOLMES:

A little patience, my dear fellow, and we'll find out. Mrs. Hudson's opening the door right now.

LESTRADE:

(OFF AND MUFFLED) Don't bother to announce me, Mrs. Hudson, I'll go on up.

HOLMES:

The metaling quality of that voice -- or should I say quantity -- obviously belongs to none other than our old friend, Inspector Lestrade.

WATSON:

Lestrade? He must be in serious trouble, or he wouldn't be coming to you for help.

HOLMES:

Yes. Our relationship has never been exactly cordial. In fact, sometimes I suspect he's a little jealous of me.

SOUND EFFECT:

KNOCK ON DOOR

HOLMES:

Come in.

SOUND EFFECT:

DOOR OPENS

LESTRADE:

(OFF) Evening, Doctor Watson.

WATSON:

(OFF A LITTLE) Hello, Lestrade. Close the door.

SOUND EFFECT:

DOOR CLOSES

HOLMES:

Hello, Lestrade. I presume this is a professional visit?

LESTRADE (FADING IN) Yes, it is, Mr. Holmes.

WATSON:

(FACETIOUSLY) I didn't imagine you'd come here on a night like this just for the pleasure of our company.

HOLMES:

Speak for yourself. I believe my company is both pleasurable and stimulating in all weathers. What's the trouble, Lestrade?

LESTRADE:

I've said unkind things about you in the past, Mr. Holmes, but frankly I need your help now. I need it desperately. What I'm going to tell you is ... (LOWERING HIS VOICE) ... very confidential. It must never be mentioned outside this home.

HOLMES:

(IMPATIENTLY) Of course, of course. You know my methods.

WATSON:

I've never talked to--

HOLMES:

(WARNINGLY) Watson!

WATSON:

Oh... sorry.

HOLMES:

Go on, Lestrade.

LESTRADE:

Well ... I'm on what you might call a "secret mission", Mr. Holmes. I've been assigned to guard a very important person. You've heard of -- (LOWERING HIS VOICE) Lord Portman?

HOLMES:

Yes, indeed. Let me refresh my memory. He's a bachelor and spends most of his time on a lonely island off the Cornish coast. Recently he returned from the Far East -- Japan, as I recall -- where he's been engaged on some diplomatic mission. Am I right?

LESTRADE:

Absolutely right, Mr. Holmes. That ... that, er, diplomatic mission -- That's what the trouble is about. He's been back on[ly] three weeks from Japan, and there have been two attempts to kill him already. That's why I've been assigned to keep an eye on him until he's finished writing this secret report of his.

HOLMES:

Then why aren't you keeping an eye on him right now?

WATSON:

Exactly what I was going to ask.

LESTRADE:

Don't worry, Mr. Holmes. I've got one of my best men with him at this moment.

HOLMES:

I see. Now, you say there have been two attempts on his life already?

LESTRADE:

That's right, Mr. Holmes.

HOLMES:

Describe these attacks.

LESTRADE:

Well, three days after he landed, a knife was thrown at him as he was driving to the Foreign Office in a hansom cab. It missed him by inches.

HOLMES:

You brought the knife with you, of course?

LESTRADE:

Yes.

HOLMES:

Good. I'll examine it later. Go on with your story.

LESTRADE:

Just two days ago, a time bomb was discovered in his room at the Savoy Hotel.

HOLMES:

A time bomb, eh? Very up to date. Any other facts to give me, Lestrade?

LESTRADE:

Yes, Mr. Holmes. This note, which had been slipped into the coat pocket of one of Lord Portman's suits after it had been sent back from the cleaners.

HOLMES:

Let me see it.

SOUND EFFECT:

CRACKLE OF PAPER

HOLMES:

Hmm... Cheap lined papers, such as you buy for a penny at any stationers. Letters crudely printed in a hand that's unused to writing in the English language.

WATSON:

Well, go on, Holmes -- What does it say?

HOLMES:

It says: (READING): "Beware! This is your last warning! Burn the report you are working on if you value your life. There will be no more warnings. There will be only death!"

WATSON:

It isn't signed, but what's that strange drawing at the bottom. Looks like some kind of flower.

HOLMES:

That, my dear fellow, is the sign of "The Black Dragon" -- the most dangerous secret society in Japan. Well -- we're crossing swords with experts, at any rate. Anything else, Lestrade?

LESTRADE:

That's all, Mr. Holmes -- except that I'm leaving tonight for Cornwall with Lord Portman. He's going back to his island to finish the report there ... and I was hoping you and Doctor Watson would return with us. It's not an official request, of course, and I suppose I might get into trouble if the Yard knew about it, but I'd feel much happier if you came along. What do you say, Mr. Holmes? We're leaving by the 10:20 from Paddington.

HOLMES:

Well, Watson? Do you feel like a little Cornish sea and air?

WATSON:

(EAGERLY) It's an interesting case, Holmes.

HOLMES:

Yes. It is an interesting case. A very interesting case. Start packing, Watson. Tomorrow we'll be in Cornwall on a lonely island, but I have a feeling that we won't be bored. I don't think we've heard the last of "The Black Dragon"!

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

SOUND EFFECT:

MEWING OF SEAGLES. MOTORBOAT ENGINE IN BACKGROUND

HOLMES:

You handle this motor boat like an expert, Lestrade.

LESTRADE:

We Scotland Yard men aren't quite so stupid as you make us out to be, Mr. Holmes.

HOLMES:

I hope you're a good sailor, Watson. The sea's quite choppy.

WATSON:

(OFF A LITTLE) Of course I'm a good sailor. (NERVOUSLY) It isn't far to this island, is it?

LESTRADE:

Don't you worry, Doctor. We'll soon be there. It's only a couple of miles.

WATSON:

(APPREHENSIVELY) Good Lord ... a couple of miles? Hope it doesn't take long.

HOLMES:

I don't see the island, Lestrade. I presume it's around this point we're heading for?

LESTRADE:

Yes, Mr. Holmes. You see that lighthouse showing above the cliff there? That's our destination.

HOLMES:

So Lord Portman has a lighthouse, eh? That's interesting.

LESTRADE:

About all there is on the island, too. Just that -- and the gloomy old stone house where Lord Portman lives.

HOLMES:

What have you found out since you've been down here, Lestrade?

LESTRADE:

Not much, Mr. Holmes. But I've talked to the handful of people that are living on the island. There's an old Cornish couple -- Mr. and Mrs. Trevelyan -- who act as cook and valet for his Lordship. They look suspicious to me -- surly and uncooperative. And then there are two men in the lighthouse. I don't like the looks of them much, either.

HOLMES:

Look, Watson! There's the island!

WATSON:

(UNENTHUSIASTICALLY) Yes ... yes ... Wish we'd hurry up and get there.

LESTRADE:

What's the matter, Dr. Watson? Not feeling sick, are you?

WATSON:

(WITHOUT CONVICTION) Sick? Of course not. Don't be silly.

HOLMES:

(CHUCKLES, THEN SPEAKS) And who else is on the island, Lestrade?

LESTRADE:

That's all, Mr. Holmes -- except, of course, Mr. Chang.

HOLMES:

Mr. Chang? Who is Mr. Chang?

LESTRADE:

I thought I told you about him last night. He's Chinese, and met Lord Portman in the east. As a matter of fact, I believe he saved his life in a street brawl in Singapore. He's been working on his Lordship's report -- helping him translate some of the Japanese documents. A very nice gentleman, Mr. Chang is -- very nice.

HOLMES:

Hmm ... An interesting group of people. A moody Cockney couple, a lighthouse keeper and his mate, our Chinese friend, Mr. Chang ... and Lord Portman. I'm very anxious to make their acquaintance.

LESTRADE:

We'll soon be there now, Mr. Holmes.

HOLMES:

What's the matter, Watson? You look positively green! And what are you doing back there?

WATSON:

(UNHAPPILY) To tell you the truth, Holmes ... I ... I ... I don't think I'm a very good sailor after all!

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

HOLMES:

Well, Lord Portman, that's an interesting little tour you've taken us on.

PORTMAN:

I thought you'd like to see the lay of the land before you started in on your investigations. Though I must say, I think Lestrade's a little inclined to exaggerate the dangers.

WATSON:

I'd hardly call it exaggeration, Lord Portman. After all, there were two attempts on your life since you've been back ... and don't forget that warning note from "The Black Dragon".

PORTMAN:

Probably some crank. And even if I were in danger in London, what can possibly happen down here? Particularly when I have Inspector Lestrade and Mr. Sherlock Holmes to guard me?

HOLMES:

Lord Portman, I wouldn't be too confident if I were you. And I assure you that Watson and myself, much as we love Cornwall, wouldn't have taken his trip unless we were fairly certain you were in grave danger.

PORTMAN:

Perhaps you're right. But I think we've talked enough about unpleasant things. I've been working on my report all the morning and deserve a little relaxation. Are you interested in fishing?

HOLMES:

Very much. I consider myself quite an artist with the fly rod.

PORTMAN:

I think I can [show?] you a kind of angling you've never seen before. Ever hear of a cormorant?

HOLMES:

Yes, indeed. It's a bird the Japanese use for fishing, isn't it?

PORTMAN:

That's right. But I'll wager you've never seen one inaction, have you?

HOLMES:

No, I haven't.

PORTMAN:

Then I'll give you a demonstration. (CALLING) Trevelyan! (HE CALLS LOUDER) Trevelyan! Confound the fellow! I'll go and get the bird myself. (FADING) You walk down to the cliff's edge there and I'll join you in a minute.

SOUND EFFECT:

FOOTSTEPS ON ROCKY PATH

WATSON:

Pretty cool customer, our Lord Portman, don't you think, Holmes? Doesn't seem in the least frightened.

HOLMES:

I wish I could share his confidence, but I'm afraid his Lordship is a little optimistic. He ... ah... he showed me a copy of the report he's working on. It exposes a fifty-year plan of Japanese conquest of the Far East. If his report is true, and I see no reason to doubt it after talking with him, any Japanese agent working in this country will do his utmost to see that Lord Portman never lives to complete it. (SHARPLY) Walk a little faster, can't you, old fellow? I hate dawdling.

WATSON:

I'm not dawdling. My legs aren't as long as yours, you know. (SUDDENLY) Look, Holmes -- Who's that coming toward us from the cliff?

HOLMES:

Unless I'm very much mistaken, that must be our Chinese friend, Mr. Chang.

WATSON:

By Jove, yes! Nice-looking fella, but definitely Oriental features.

HOLMES:

(SOFTLY) Quiet, Watson -- he may hear you. (RAISING HIS VOICE) Mr. Chang, I presume?

CHANG:

(OFF) Yes. That is right.

HOLMES:

I am Sherlock Holmes, and this is my friend, Dr. Watson.

WATSON:

How d'you do, Mr. Chang.

SOUND EFFECT:

FOOTSTEPS STOP

CHANG:

I am so happy to meet you, Mr. Holmes -- and you, Dr. Watson. Lord Portman told me you were coming down.

HOLMES:

Won't you stroll back to the cliff's edge with us, Mr. Chang? His Lordship is going to give us a demonstration of cormorant fishing.

SOUND EFFECT:

FOOTSTEPS STARTING

CHANG:

That will be very interesting if you have not seen it before. Of course, I have seen it many times when I was in Japan.

HOLMES:

I suppose Lord Portman brought the bird with him when he came back?

CHANG:

That is right. I myself was a little surprised it survived the journey.

SOUND EFFECT:

SEAGULLS IN BACKGROUND. WIND UP A LITTLE. SOUND OF WAVES BREAKING ON ROCKS. FOOTSTEPS CEASE

HOLMES:

I presume this is the point that his Lordship referred to.

WATSON:

Beautiful spot! Reminds me of that--

HOLMES:

(INTERRUPTING HIM) Never mind your reminiscences, Watson. Here comes Lord Portman now -- with the cormorant.

CHANG:

(LOW) Mr. Holmes, I can't tell you how happy I am that you're here. I'm sure Lord Portman is in grave danger and he's so foolhardy. It's--

HOLMES:

Shh! Here he comes now. (RAISING HIS VOICE) So that's your cormorant, Lord Portman.

PORTMAN:

Yes. I think he's going to show off for us nicely today. He's very restless. I have quite a time carrying him.

SOUND EFFECT:

CAWING OF BIRD, RUSTLE OF FEATHERS

PORTMAN:

Easy fellow, easy.

WATSON:

Good Heavens! I had no idea they were such large birds. Why, it's bigger than a mallard!

PORTMAN:

Now gentlemen, the natural instinct of the cormorant is to catch fish by diving into the water and snatching the fish in its mouth. You see this small steel ring around its throat -- right here?

SOUND EFFECT:

CAWING OF BIRD, RUSTLE OF FEATHERS

HOLMES:

Very ingenious. The object obviously being to prevent the bird from swallowing the fish?

PORTMAN:

Exactly.

WATSON:

Extraordinary! But doesn't it injure the bird?

CHANG:

Oh no, Doctor. It's quite a common practice in the Far East.

PORTMAN:

I'll give you a demonstration. Here fellow ... Off you go!

SOUND EFFECT:

CRY OF BIRD, FLAP OF WINGS FLYING AWAY

PORTMAN:

I hope the fish are running today. If they are, he never fails to catch some.

WATSON:

(LAUGHINGLY) There he goes! Soaring and sweeping! I hope he comes back.

PORTMAN:

He will. He's trained to bring the fish right back to his starting place. (SUDDENLY) Look! He's seen something!

HOLMES:

There he goes! Plummeting down and ... By Jove, Watson! I believe he's caught one!

WATSON:

He has! And here he comes back with it! Most amazing thing I've ever seen!

SOUND EFFECT:

FLAP OF APPROACHING WINGS. BIRD CRIES

PORTMAN:

There's a good fellow.

WATSON:

(IN AMAZEMENT) He's dropping it at your feet. 'Pon my soul....

HOLMES:

A very interesting demonstration, Lord Portman. Very interesting. And quite a reversal of the usual procedure. I've never seen a feathered retriever before.

PORTMAN:

I thought you'd be -- (BREAKING OFF) Hello ... What's the matter with Lestrade? He's running in our direction as though--

LESTRADE:

(FADING IN -- EXCITEDLY) Lord Portman! Mr. Holmes .... (HE PANTS FOR BREATH)

HOLMES:

Well, what is it, man? What is it?

LESTRADE:

(BREATHLESSLY) This note ... Just found it pinned on the back of Lord Portman's chair in the study!

HOLMES:

Let's see it....

SOUND EFFECT:

CRACKLING OF PAPER

LESTRADE:

(AGGRIEVEDLY) You're all out here fishing and I'm in the--

HOLMES:

(IMPATIENTLY) Quiet, Lestrade. Hmm....

WATSON:

Well, Holmes? What does it say?

HOLMES:

(READING) "You have signed your death warrant! There are no more warnings. Only the form of execution to be decided for you and that Asiatic traitor who is working with you -- Mr. Chang. You have made your last mistake!"

WATSON:

(NERVOUSLY) Good Lord! "Form of execution"! Is it signed?

HOLMES:

Of course it is, Watson. It's signed with the mark of "The Black Dragon"

MUSIC:

UP STRONG AND FINISH

CAMPBELL:

Well, this time it looks as if The Black Dragon Society really means business ... but we'll get the rest of the story in just a few seconds. And that gives me just enough time to say that you can make any hot weather meal more refreshing by serving it with a good Petri wine. Either a Petri California Sauterne, or a Petri California Burgundy. You'll find both Petri Sauterne and Petri Burgundy have the very happy faculty of making everything you eat taste better -- whether it's a sandwich or a fancy company dinner. So why not stop at your wine merchant some evening and pick up a bottle of Petri Sauterne or Petri Burgundy? Or better yet, get them both, and see which you like best. I'm sure you'll agree that with food, nothing can take the place of that good Petri wine. And now ... back to tonight's new adventure of Sherlock Holmes! Inspector Lestrade has involved the aid of Sherlock Holmes in guarding the life of Lord Portman, a diplomat recently returned from Japan. On his lonely island off the rocky Cornish coast, he is completing a report exposing plans for Japanese world domination. Two attempts have been made on his life, and a warning note prophesying immediate death has been discovered soon after Holmes' arrival on the island -- a note signed by "The Black Dragon". As we again join tonight's story, Holmes and Watson are in a gloomy stone house cross-examining Mr. and Mrs. Trevelyan, Lord Portman's servants....

WATSON:

I think you'll find it'll pay to answer Mr.Holmes's questions, my good man.

TREVELYAN:

(SURLY, CORNISH ACCENT) I don't have to answer questions. My wife and I mind our own business. Why don't you do the same?

WATSON:

(ANGRILY) Impertinence'll get you nowhere!

HOLMES:

Easy, Watson. Easy. (AFTER A MOMENT) Mrs. Trevelyan, how long have you and your husband been with Lord Portman?

MRS. TREVELYAN:

(A LITTLE FRIGHTENED) It's like Ned here says. We don't have to answer questions.

WATSON:

Of course you don't have to. But what possible objection can you have... ?

HOLMES:

Leave this to me, Watson, that's a good fellow. (GENTLY) Mrs. Trevelyan, you like Lord Portman, don't you?

MRS. TREVELYAN:

Of course I like him.

HOLMES:

And you want to do anything in your power to help him.

MRS. TREVELYAN:

I suppose so.

HOLMES:

Of course you do, Mrs. Trevelyan. Now tell me -- How long have you and your husband been with Lord Portman?

MRS. TREVELYAN:

Just since he came back. We were engaged by an agency in Portcawl.

HOLMES:

And where were you both before that?

MRS. TREVELYAN:

(FALTERING) Well, I ... I .....

TREVELYAN:

(ANGRILY) You keep your mouth closed, Martha! And you, Mister Sherlock Holmes, or whatever your name is -- You'll keep your long nose out of my affairs if you know what's good for you! Anyone would think we're criminals, the way you talk to us! Come on, Martha! (STARTING TO FADE) Let's get out of here.

WATSON:

I told you it was no good being nice to them, Holmes.

HOLMES:

(CALLING) Mr. Trevelyan!

TREVELYAN:

(OFF A LITTLE) What is it now?

HOLMES:

Did you ever use the name of Denton? Charles Denton?

TREVELYAN:

(OFF, LIVID WITH RAGE) I told you to keep your nose out of my affairs. Leave me alone, d'you hear? We've done nothing!

SOUND EFFECT:

VIOLENT DOOR SLAMS (OFF)

WATSON:

What an ugly brute. I say, Holmes -- Why did you ask him if he ever used the name of Denton?

HOLMES:

I seldom forget a face, and unless I'm much mistaken, we'll find Ned Trevelyan is really Charles Denton, who was involved in the celebrated Quarry Murder in Lynton some ten years ago. As I recall, he was lucky enough to escape with an eight-year sentence. Yes, I think we'll find Mr. Trevelyan's last place of employment was Dartmoor Prison.

WATSON:

Good Heavens! We can't have a ruffian like that running around loose. He may murder us all in our beds! Shouldn't Lestrade arrest him?

HOLMES:

He hasn't committed any crime here -- as far as we know. No, we'll keep a weather eye open and later on take the motor boat and go ashore and see what we can find out about him.

WATSON:

(GROANING) Oh Lord, Holmes -- Not that confounded boat again!

HOLMES:

Meanwhile, I'd like to talk to the lighthouse-keeper and his mate.

WATSON:

(INTERRUPTING) What's that? Quick, Holmes!

SOUND EFFECT:

MOTOR BOAT ENGINE STARTING UP (OFF)

WATSON:

(EXCITEDLY) Quick, Holmes! Look! Out of the window! The motor boat -- it's headed out to sea!

SOUND EFFECT:

MOTOR BOAT UP STRONG, THEN FADING AWAY

WATSON:

And what's more, there's no one in it! Look at the crazy course it's steering.

HOLMES:

I underestimated the cleverness of our opponent, Watson. I'm afraid we're marooned on this island -- marooned with The Black Dragon!

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

HOLMES:

Watson! Watson! Wake up, old fellow.

WATSON:

(SLEEPILY) Hmm... What... ?

HOLMES:

I told you to sit out here on the lawn and keep an eye on Lord Portman's window. I didn't expect you to go to sleep!

WATSON:

I wasn't asleep. I was just thinking.

HOLMES:

I didn't know you snored when you were thinking.

WATSON:

What have you found out, Holmes?

HOLMES:

I questioned the lighthouse keeper and his mate without much result. Also, I examined the hawser that was attached to the motor boat. The engine had been started and then the rope had been slashed through. No clues there. However, we're not marooned. A relief boat bringing oil for the lighthouse is due tonight. But I have made one very interesting discovery: A fish -- a carp weighing about a pound-and-a-quarter -- was stolen from the kitchen last night.

WATSON:

What's interesting about that? Probably the cat took it.

HOLMES:

There is no cat. No, I have a feeling....

WATSON:

Hello ... Here comes Lord Portman and Mr. Chang. Splendid! His Lordship's got the cormorant with him. He's going to give us another demonstration.

PORTMAN:

(FADING IN) Mr. Chang has persuaded me that I've done enough work today, Holmes. He's suggested that you and Dr. Watson might like to see another demonstration.

HOLMES:

Very well, Lord Portman. In fact, I insist upon it.

PORTMAN:

Come along, then. Let's walk over to the cliff's edge. Chang, you carry the bird, will you?

CHANG:

Come on. That's it.

SOUND EFFECT:

BIRD NOISES, SCUFFLING OF FEATHERS, FOOTSTEPS

HOLMES:

How's the report coming along?

CHANG:

We are nearly finished, Mr. Holmes. I am very proud to have helped Lord Portman on such a work. It is a great honor for me and my country.

PORTMAN:

You've been a great help to me, Chang. Couldn't have done it without you.

WATSON:

Look behind us! Here comes Lestrade, running as fast as his legs will carry him. Why does that fellow always move around at the gallop?

SOUND EFFECT:

RUNNING FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING

LESTRADE:

(FADING IN EXCITEDLY) Mr. Holmes ... Mr. Holmes!

HOLMES:

(CALLS) What's the matter, Lestrade? (CLOSER) Let's wait for him. He seems to be excited about something.

LESTRADE:

I've just found out there's a boat due here in two hours. It's a relief boat bringing oil to the lighthouse. Mrs. Trevelyan just told me.

HOLMES:

Don't get so excited, Lestrade. It's bad for your blood pressure. Anyway, I had found out the same fact two hours ago. Come out and watch us do a little fishing. It'll help calm you down.

LESTRADE:

(AGGRIEVEDLY) You might have told me. It would have saved me a lot of questioning.

HOLMES:

I won't want to usurp all your functions. After all, you are the official representative of the law amongst us.

PORTMAN:

Well ... here we are at the point again.

SOUND EFFECT:

WIND UP. MEWING OF SEAGULLS

PORTMAN:

Give me the cormorant, Chang. Let's see what he'll bring us back this time.

HOLMES:

(A NEW NOTE IN HIS VOICE) I think you may be surprised, Lord Portman.

PORTMAN:

Off you go!

SOUND EFFECT:

FLAPPING OF BIRD'S WINGS FADING AWAY

WATSON:

Look at him! (AFTER A MOMENT) Hello -- He's diving down toward that rock. There's something floating beside it. He's pecking at it.

HOLMES:

Just what I thought! Lestrade -- Keep an eye on Mr. Chang there. He seems to be leaving us.

WATSON:

Here comes the bird back with it.

PORTMAN:

Holmes! What are you doing with that revolver? Don't shoot at my bird! You mustn't--

SOUND EFFECT:

REVOLVER SHOT FOLLOWED BY STRANGE DULL EXPLOSION

WATSON:

Good Heavens! The bird -- it ... it exploded in mid-air!

HOLMES:

Lestrade! Bring Mr. Chang back here!

LESTRADE:

(OFF, STRUGGLING) Come on!

CHANG:

(OFF, WILDLY) Leave me alone! I haven't done anything!

LESTRADE:

(FADING IN) Mr. Holmes wants to talk to you.

CHANG:

(FADING IN) You're making a mistake!

PORTMAN:

(TESTILY) Mr. Holmes, will you have the goodness to tell me what in thunder is going on? You've just killed my valuable cormorant, and now you appear to be accusing the man who has been helping me all these weeks.

HOLMES:

Lord Portman, I shall be delighted to explain. In the first place, I am accusing Mr. Chang, because he is not a Chinese helper of yours, but a Japanese agent. I knew that all along.

WATSON:

Why, Holmes I--

HOLMES:

And in the second place, if I had not killed your valuable cormorant, it would have killed you!

PORTMAN:

What on earth do you mean?

HOLMES:

I mean that what the bird was carrying back to you just now was a cleverly disguised infernal machine. Last night, a fish was stolen from the kitchen by Mr. Chang here. He scooped out the insides of the fish and inserted his devilish contraption -- then sewed it up again to look as if it had never been touched. A very toxic kind of taxidermy. Then he placed it on a piece of wood and anchored it near the rock there, knowing the bird would pick it up and drop it at your feet. Had this happened, I fear we should have all been blown to kingdom come -- all of us except Mr. Chang. He apparently had an urgent appointment elsewhere. And so ... I was regretfully compelled to shoot our bird before he unwittingly caused our destruction.

PORTMAN:

Well, I'll be... Chang, you infernal scoundrel!

CHANG:

(HYSTERICALLY) You think you are clever, Mr. Holmes! But you are not as clever as we Japanese! One day we will rule the world! You will be our slaves!

HOLMES:

Take him away, Lestrade. Take him away. For a "dragon", he's beginning to sound remarkably like a rat!

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

CAMPBELL:

That certainly was an interesting story, Doctor.

WATSON:

Yes, Mr. Campbell, and it showed that even back in those days, the Japanese were laying their filthy plans for world domination.

CAMPBELL:

There's only one thing that puzzles me about the story. Why didn't Mr. Chang kill Lord Portman as soon as he knew he was writing the report? Why did he wait until the report was finished?

WATSON:

Because he wanted to know just how much Lord Portman did know, and because he wanted to check on all the diplomatic channels through which he worked.

CAMPBELL:

There's one other thing that worries me. How did Holmes know all along that Chang was Japanese and not Chinese?

WATSON:

I must say that had me puzzled, too, but when I asked the great man himself, it all seemed very simple. A Japanese finds it very hard to pronounce the letter "L", and in its place uses the letter "R". Did you notice, for instance, the way Chang pronounced "Sherlock Holmes"? He called him "Sherrock Horms".

CAMPBELL:

I can't say I did notice, but I'll watch out for it in future stories. Just one more point, Doctor....

WATSON:

Well really, Mr. Campbell, you're very hard to please tonight.

CAMPBELL:

I'm sorry, but didn't Lestrade say that Mr. Chang had saved Lord Portman's life in a street brawl in Singapore?

WATSON:

(CHUCKLING) I'm flattered that you listen to my stories so attentively. Yes, he did say that, Mr. Campbell -- but that brawl was staged by Chang so that he could gain Lord Portman's confidence. And now -- if you've finished with your questions, I have one I'd like to ask you.

CAMPBELL:

Well, proceed, Doctor. Proceed.

WATSON:

Well, earlier this evening, you told about making a Petri wine-and-soda, but you neglected to mention just what Petri wine makes the best wine-and-soda.

CAMPBELL:

Well, that's a matter of preference, Doctor. I personally make my wine-and-soda with either a Petri California Burgundy or a Petri California Sauterne. But you'll get a good wine-and-soda with any Petri wine because every Petri wine is a good wine. You see, all Petri wines are the result of generations of wine-making. The Petri business is family owned -- has been ever since it was started back in the nineteenth century. Therefore, everything the Petri family ever learned about the fine art of transforming luscious, sun-ripened grapes into fragrant delicious wine, they've been able to keep in the family, handing down from father to son, from father to son, all this accumulated skill and experience. That's why when you get a Petri wine -- any Petri wine -- you can rest assured you're getting a good wine. Because Petri took time to bring you good wine. And now, Doctor, what about next week's story?

WATSON:

Next week, I'm going to tell you a strange and macabre story that took place in Paris, in which a celebrated French dancer invited Holmes to a dinner party at which she proposed to murder a man ... right under his very nose!

MUSIC:

SCOTCH POEM

CAMPBELL:

Tonight's Sherlock Holmes adventure is written by Denis Green and Bruce Taylor and is based on an incident in the Sir Arthur Conan Doyle story, "The Five Orange Pips". Mr. Rathbone appears through the courtesy of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, and Mr. Bruce through the courtesy of Universal Pictures, where they are now starring in the Sherlock Holmes series.

MUSIC:

(THEME UP AND DOWN UNDER)

CAMPBELL:

The Petri Wine Company of San Francisco, California invites you to tune in again next week, same time, same station.

MUSIC:

HIT JINGLE

SINGERS:

Oh, the Petri family took the time, to bring you such good wine, so when you eat and when you cook, Remember Petri Wine!

CAMPBELL:

Yes, Petri Wine, made by the Petri Wine Company, San Francisco, California.

SINGERS:

Pet -- Pet -- Petri ... Wine.

CAMPBELL:

This is Bob Campbell saying goodnight for the Petri family. Sherlock Holmes comes to you from the Don Lee studios in Hollywood.

CUE:

This is Mutual!