Generic Radio Workshop Script Library (BACK)

Series: Mysterious Traveler
Show: Mr. Trimble's Turnabout Christmas
Date: Dec 23 1947

MR. TRIMBLE'S TURNABOUT CHRISTMAS

A Special Program of
THE MYSTERIOUS TRAVELER

Chapter 133
TUESDAY, DECEMBER 23, 1947
8:00-8:30 PM EST

Written and directed by BOB ARTHUR & DAVID KOGAN

CAST:
MYSTERIOUS TRAVELER
OFFICER
TIMOTHY TRIMBLE
BUTCHER
MRS. TRIMBLE
CLERK
BENNY
GIRL
JOE
PERFUMER
MAN
VOICE
WAITRESS

MUSIC:

OPENING THEME

SOUND:

(WHISTLE IN, TRAIN BEHIND)

ANNCR:

The Mysterious Traveler!

MUSIC THEME AND BEHIND

M. T.:

This is the Mysterious Traveler, inviting you to join me in a little Christmas fun. Day after tomorrow is Christmas Day, and this is the holiday season when hearts are light and stories should be gay to match the mood of the occasion. So tonight we'll have no screams, no groans, no moans, no pistol shots. Nothing bad is going to happen to anyone--well, practically nothing--so settle back and listen now to the story of "MR. TRIMBLE'S TURNABOUT CHRISTMAS."

MUSIC CHRISTMASY AND BEHIND

M. T.:

It is Christmas morning in Brooklyn Heights, Brooklyn, U. S. A. Our hero, Mr. Timothy Trimble, is still in bed, though the clock is striking ten.

SOUND:

(CLOCK STRIKES BEHIND)

M. T.:

Mr. Trimble, after a hectic Christmas Eve spent In singing carols, does not feel like getting up, in spite of the urging of his good wife, Louise....

LOUISE:

Timothy! It's ten o'clock! You've got to get up!

THIMBLE:

(YAWNS) Umm. . .ahh.. .what you say, Louise?

LOUISE:

It's ten o'clock! You've got to get up! This Is Christmas, and we have a thousand things to do!

TRIMBLE:

No! I'm not going to get up! I'm just going to stay right here until tomorrow!

LOUISE:

Timothy! This is Christmas! You might seem cheerful this morning. Just for a change!

TRIMBLE:

I don't feel cheerful! I hate Christmas!

LOUISE:

Timothy! (SCANDALIZED) What a way to talk!

TRIMBLE:

I mean it! Nowadays Christmas begins on the first of December and it isn't over until the last present is exchanged on December thirty-first. Why don't they just change the name of the month to Christmas and be done with it!

LOUISE:

That reminds me---you've got to find a present for Aunt Agatha and one for Uncle Elmer, and something for the Children. They're driving up from Philadelphia to have Christmas dinner with us. They just phoned.

TRIMBLE:

(MOANS) Oh, no! No! Not Uncle Elmer and Aunt Agatha and the children!

LOUISE:

So you've just got to get up! (FADES) Please hurry, Timothy.

TRIMBLE:

(NOT MEANING A WORD OF IT) Aw right, Louise. I'll get up. (ALMOST A SNORE) I'll get ri' up--in a just a minute. (HE DOES SNORE)

BENNY:

Oh, no you don't, Trimble! We got too much to do, me an' you. No beauty nap for you this morning!

TRIMBLE:

(STARTLED AWAKE) What? Who said that? Where are you?

BENNY:

Here I am--on top of your bureau.

TRIMBLE:

On top of my bureau?...A live Santa Claus, a foot high, sitting on top of my bureau! (UP) Louise! Louise!

BENNY:

That was a dumb trick, Trimble! She won't see me, and you'll just be in dutch.

LOUISE:

(COMES IN) Yes, what is It?

TRIMBLE:

Louise! Just--take a look at my bureau....

LOUISE:

Well, I'm looking. What am I supposed to see?

TRIMBLE:

Do you see a Santa Claus a foot high...

BENNY:

(INDIGNANT) Eighteen Inches!

TRIMBLE:

(CORRECTING HIMSELF) ....eighteen inches high, sitting on top of my bureau and swinging his feet over the edges?

LOUISE:

Of course I don't see any such thing! The only Santa's in this house are the little glass ones hanging on the tree.

TRIMBLE:

But this isn't a toy. This Santa Claus is alive!

LOUISE:

A live Santa Claus eighteen inches tall!....Timothy, what nonsense are you up to?

TRIMBLE:

Louise, I'm going to stay in bed today! My stomach ia all upset. I'm seeing things that aren't there!

LOUISE:

You're not going to get out of helping me by pretending to be sick! Come on now, Timothy, get out of that bed!

TRIMBLE:

Ouch! All right--I'm getting up......I'm up.

LOUISE:

And see you stay up. (FADES) I'll give you five minutes to get dressed.

BENNY:

I told you it was a dumb trick...Oh no you ain't lying down again. (IMITATES REVILLE) You gotta get up, you gotta get up, you gotta get up on Christmas,......

TRIM:

(WINCES...WHAT A HEAD HE HAS!) Please! You'll disturb the whole neighborhood.

BEN:

Trimble, ain't you caught on yet? Nobody can't see me or hear me but you. I'm your Christmas Spirit, your own poisonal Christmas spirit!

TRIM:

Oh, if only I hadn't drunk all that eggnog last night

BEN:

Never mind the eggnog. You'd be seein' me if you'd drunk nothing but aqua of the most pura.

TRIM:

No, I wouldn't. You're just a--a figment of my imagination.

B3N:

Them's harsh words, when I come here to make this th' happiest Christmas of your life.

TRIM:

An Invisible Santa Claus one foot tall!

BEN:

Eighteen Inches!

TRIM:

Eighteen inches tall! It's not possible!

BEN:

So I ain't possible! I see I got to reason with you. Everything else is possible in Brooklyn. So why can't Brooklyn have an Invisible Santa Claus? What've you got against Brooklyn?

TRIM:

I haven't got anything against Brooklyn! I love Brooklyn!

BEN:

So it's all settled. I'm real. You can call me Benny.

TRIMBLE:

Benny? Why Benny?

BEN:

'Cause tha's my name, dope! Benny--short, for Benevolent. 1'm a Christmas Spirit.

TRIM:

A Christmas Spirit?

BEN:

Yeah, an' I dress like Santa Clause because all Christmas Spirits do. Now have we got that settled, or ain't we?

TRIM:

All Christmas Spirits? You mean there are more like you?

BEN:

There's thousands of us. We're th' answer to how Santa Claus gets everthing done in just one day. I'm th' Brooklyn delegate.

TRIM:

I see---no, I don't see! What're you doing here on my bureau?

%u2022BEN':

Today I don't belong to Brooklyn--I belong to you, Timothy T. Trimble. You been voted th' winner of the Christmas Spirits Goodnesa Award for 1947, and for once you're gonna have th' Christmas every man dreams about.

TRIM:

What're you talking about? What's the Christmas Spirits goodness award?

BEN:

It's like this. For years us Christmas Spirits has been watchin' guys like you give and give till it hurts, but never get. This year we decided to elect one citizen in the whole world to get for a change. You following me, Trimble?

TRIM:

A cup of black coffee%u2014oh. If I only had a cup of black coffee!

BEN:

Stop mimbling and listen to me! I'm saying that you Timothy T. Trimble, was elected winner of th' Christmas Spirits Goodness Award for bein' th' world's best citizen In the year 1947.

TRIM:

Who, me? But I'm not---

BEN:

See, modest, too. That's one reason you was elected. You won by thirty seven votes over a guy named Horace Q. Wrigley, of Pasadena, California, who collects cigar bands. So now, to collect the Christmas you got coming to you, leave us be on our way.

TRIM:

No, no, I won't.

LOUISE:

(COMES IN) Timothy, are you dressed yet? Oh, you are. Good!

TRIM:

Louise, I'm going back to bed. I feel terrible.

LOUISE:

Go to bed nothing! First you have to give the building employees their Christmas money. Have you got it ready?

TRIM:

(SOUR) Yes, I have it ready. Tom, and Joe, and Bill and the superintendent.

LOUISE:

That's right. Then you'd better have breakfast in a restaurant. I simply haven't time to fix you anything.

TRIM:

But Louise------- .

LOUISE:

After that you've got to go buy presents for Uncle Elmer and Aunt Agatha and the children. Don't forget, Timothy.

TRIM:

But this is Christmas! There aren't any stores open. Where can I buy present today?

LOUISE:

That's your problem, Timothy. I have quite enough other things to worry about. But remember, nice presents now. Nothing from the drugstore. You know how Aunt Agatha and Uncle Elmer hate cheap things.

TRIM:

And you know how I hate Uncle Elmer and Aunt Agatha!

LOUISE:

Now Timothy, they're your relatives, not mine....Oh, I almost forgot. We haven't a turkey!

TRIM:

Well, what of it? Do we have to have turkey? I'm sick of turkey!

LOUISE:

For just you and me, I was going to have chops. But Uncle Elmer and Aunt Agatha and the children will expect turkey. Uncle Elmer said so on the phone.

TRIM:

But there aren't any butcher shops open today! Louise, you've got to listen to me! I don't feel well and%u2014-

LOUISE:

For goodness sake, why are you just standing there? Get your hat and coat and go!

BEN:

Well, Trimble, you gonna argue any more, or you gonna come along with me?

TRIM:

Benny, stop pulling at my coat! I don't like It?

LOUISE:

(HALF OFF) What, Timothy? What did you say?

TRIM:

(DEFEATED) Nothing, my dear. I'm going. (FROM THE BOTTOM OF HIS HEART.) Christmas! Why was it ever Invented!

MUSIC:

LAUGHING .CHRISTMAS MOTIF UP AND CUT

SOUND:

(WHINE OF ELEVATOR RISING IN B.C.)

TRIM:

(TO HIMSELF) Now let's see%u2014%u2014five dollars for Joe, the elevator boy, and five for Tom, on the night shift, and ten for the superintendent....

BEN:

Are you in for a surprise, Trimble!

TRIM? Please go away. Please, before somebody else sees you.

BEN:

Don't worry, nobody else won't. Now here's th' elevator. Just act nacheral.

SOUND:

(ELEVATOR STOPS AND CAR DOOR OPENS)

JOE:

Oh, hello, Mr. Trimble!

TRIM:

Quick, Joe, shut the door fast.

SOUND:

(DOOR SHUTS PAST)

TRIM:

Now take me straight down and don't stop!

JOE:

Anything you say, Mr. Trimble.

SOUND:

(ELEVATOR DESCENDS)

TRIM:

(SIGH OF RELIEF) We were too quick for him! Thank heavens! Oh, by the way, Joe, Merry Christmas!

JOE; Merry Christmas to you, too, Mr. Trimble....oh,--.no you don't. Put that envelope back in your pocket, thanks just the same.

TRIMBLE:

But Joe%u2014it's a little Christmas remembrance. Just in the spirit of the season. (LAUGHS HOLLOWLY)

JOEs; No sir, not this year! Instead, you take this!

TRIM:

A five dollar bill!

JOEs Yes, sir! This year I'm giving you th' present!

TRIM:

Did I hear you say you're giving me the present?

JOE:

Absolutely--just for being such a swell tenant%u2014th' one guy who don't ever complain if I'm late with th' car, who tips me every time I hafta let him in his apartment, who always says hello%u2014-you prob'ly don't know it, Mr. Trimble, but you're th' best passenger any elevator operator ever had.

TRIM:

I--I don't know what to say!

JOE:

That's 'cause you're so modest.

TRIM:

I think I need a little air!

JOE:

Sure thing.

SOUND:

(ELEVATOR CAR STOPS%u2014DOOR OPENS)

JOE:

Here you are, main floor. Have a swell Christmas!

TRIM:

Thanks. (GASPS) That great big fellow there in the lobby%u2014-

JOE:

What about him?

TRIM:

I think I recognize him. He's-%u2014Oh oh, he's seen me!

MAN:

(OFF, VERY TOUGH, RASPING VOICE) Hey, Trimble! I want to talk to you!

TRIM:

Quick, Joe! Down to the basement!

JOE:

Yes, sir!

SOUND:

(DOOR CLANGS SHUT, ELEVATOR STARTS FAST)

MAN:

(OVER, OFF) Hey, Trimble! Trimble, come back here!

TRIM:

That was close. I'm positive that's the fellow who was so nasty to me down at the Income Tax Bureau last March. He probably found out about that deduction I chiseled on, and wanted to question me!

JOE:

And on Christmas too! Them guys got no pity!

SOUND:

(ELEVATOR STOPS, DOOR OPENS)

JOE:

Well, here you are. Slide down the alley and he'll never catch you.

TRIM:

Thanks, Joe.

JOE:

(FADING OFF) And a merry Christmas again, Mr. Trimble!

TRIM:

First an invisible Santa Claus...then the Income Tax people..oh, what a day this is going to be. Well, I better get started and.....

BEN:

(WAY OFF) Hey, Trimble, not so fast!

SOUND:

(SLIDE WHISTLE SQUALS FROM HIGH TO LOW)

BEN:

Thought you were gonna ditch me, hey? Fine business!

TRIM:

How did you follow me?

BEN:

Down th' air shaft. I'm not lettin' you outa my sight until midnight. First we're gonna put a good breakfast In you, then-%u2014%u2014Christmas, here comes Trimble!

(MUSIC: CHRISTMASY UP AND OUT

SOUND:

(CUP AND SAUCER SOUND)

TRIM:

(SIGHS WITH SATISFACTION)

BEN:

Well, Trimble, feelln' better now, with three cups of Java in you.

TRIM:

I ought to be, but I s-till see you, so I guess I don't.

BEN:

I'm disapernted In you, Trimble. You ain't got th' true Brooklyn spirit.

WAITRESS:

(YOUNG AND SEXY...COMES IN) Excuse me, Mr. Trimble, were you speaking to me?

TRIM:

Er%u2014no, I guess I was%u2014ah. Just thinking out loud.

WAITRESS:

I understand. More coffee? Or some ham and eggs? Or maybe some waffles:-'with real maple syrup?

TRIM:

No%u2014I guess not. Just let me have the check.

WAITRESS:

Oh, there's no check today, Mr. Trimble.

TRIM:

No check?

WAITRESS:

Manager's orders. He says you're the kind of customer who gives tone to a place.

TRIM:

Oh, well, thanks. Then here's something for you.

WAITRESS:

Oh, no, Mr. Trimble, here's something for you!

BEN:

She's giving you a quarter. Take it, stupid!

TRIM:

I, uh, but what's this for?

WAITRESS:

Today I'm tipping you, for being such a nice customer. You don't mind do you?

TRIM:

Well, I%u2014I%u2014%u2014

BEN:

Where's your manners? Tell her you don't mind.

TRIM:

Of course I don't mind, but%u2014

WAITRESS:

I knew you wouldn't. I keep telling the girls what a real gentleman you are. Oh, if there were only more men in the world like you, Mr. Trimble!

TRIM:

(FEEBLY) But there must be a lot of men in the world like me.

WAITRESS:

Oh, but there aren't. (SEXY GIGGLE) Believe me, I know.

MAN:

(OFF, NASTY) Hey, Trimble!

TRIM:

Oh, oh! (FAST) Quick, the back way%u2014where is it?

WAIT:

Right through there!

MAN! (STILL OFF,..VERY NASTY) Trimble, come back here! I got some business with you!

WAIT Hurry, Mr. Trimble, hurry. (UP) And Merry Christmas, Mr. Trimble!

MUSIC:

BRIDGE AND OUT

SOUND:

(OLD CAR SPEEDING ALONG)

BEN That was nice footwork back there, Trimble. So why so gloomy, why so morbid?

TRIM Please, Benny---just go away. That all I ask. Just go away.

BEN At midnight, Trimble, and not one second sooner. You're gonna enjoy this Christmas If it kills you...Now step on it! This old jalopy of yours has got to cover territory today.

SOUND:

(CAR UP)

TRIM:

Benny! Get off my foot! You're pushing down the throttle and there's a red light ahead...Oh, oh, we went through a red light and there was a cop right there!

SOUND! (SHRILL POLICE WHISTLE, OFF, BEHIND PREVIOUS SENTENCE...CAR SLOWS AND STOPS)

TRIM Here he comes! Oh, what a day? First you--then the income tax bureau%u2014now I'll probably wind up in Jail.

BEN Take it easy, Trimble. Take it easy. You'll see.

OFFICER (COMES IN) Well, in a big hurry, are you? Such a hurry you go right through our pretty red lights!

TRIM:

I'm sorry, officer. I guess I got absent-minded. You see, my wife sent me out on some errands, and I was going too fast, and...

OFFICER:

(VERY FRIENDLY) Sure, I understand. I got a wife like that too. You're in a hurry?... Lemme help you. Walt, I'll get that truck out of your way. (FADES WELL OFF...YELLS) Hey, you! Get that heap of junk outa th' way or I'll run you in. Yeah, that's it, move it! (COMES BACK) There you are. Just go as fast as you like. Here's a special card%u2014if anybody stops you, Just show it to 'em and they won't bother you.

TRIM:

Why, thank you, officer, thank you very much.

SOUND:

(CAR STARTS AND PULLS AWAY)

OFFICER:

(SOLO) Now why did I do that? What got into me, anyway? I must be slippin'! I didn't give him a ticket!

MUSIC:

GAY AND BEHIND)

SOUND:

(CAR GOING ALONG)

BEN:

Well, Trimble, feel better now? Beginning to believe it's really Christmas?

THIM:

I--I don't know. Nothing like that ever happened to me before, He--he was polite to me. A traffic cop!

BEN:

You ain't seen nothing, yet. Now what's next%u2014oh yeah, th' turkey you gotta get. Just pull up at th' first butcher shop we come to. It don't matter which-- it'll be open!

MUSIC:

UP AGAIN QUICK AND OUT

BUTCHER:

Am I having a turkey for you, Mr. Trimble? (TURNS JUST OFF) One second and I'm showing you if I'm having a turkey for you. (ON AGAIN) Here you are/

SOUND:

(HEAVY, MEATY THUMP)

BUTCHER:

Is that a turkey or is that a turkey?

TRIM:

It's a turkey, all right.

BEN:

To me it looks more like a ostrich, except it's a little on th' large side.

BUTCHER:

Compared to that turkey, what Mr. President Truman himself is eating today is nothing but a humming bird, a skinny little humming bird.

TRIM:

Yes, I see what you mean. Uh--how much is it?

BUTCHER:

How much is it? Timothy T. Trimble asks me that on today, Christmas! To you, Mr. Trimble the price is no dollars and no cents, exact. And I'm throwing in ten pounds steak!

MUSIC:

(UP AND OUT)

SOUND:

(TAXI DRIVING ALONG)

BEN:

Well, Trimble, feeling better?

TRIM:

Yes, I guess I an. Benny, is this really happening? Pinch me so I can be sure.....Yeow! Not so hard!

BEN:

Well, is it really happening?

TRIM:

It's happening, all right....But you're sure I won't wake up and find it's just a dream, as soon as Christmas is over.

BEN:

This is no dream, Trimble. Some place it might be a dream, but not in Brooklyn. Here's it's real. Now where? What else you got on your mind?

TRIM:

Well, there's the presents for Uncle Elmer and Aunt Agatha--and then, the truth is, I completely forgot to get anything for Louise.

BEN:

Don't give it a thought, Trimble! What does th' little lady like? Poifumes,Jewels, furs, books....

TRIM:

She's not much of a reader, but%u2014-

BEN:

But she's a woman. Say no more, Trimble, your problem is in the hands of an authority on women.

TRIM:

But none of the stores are open today!

BEN:

Trimble, am I on th' Job or ain't I? If Timothy T. Trimble wants a store open today%u2014it's open!

MUSIC:

UP AND OUT)

CLERK:

You like the bracelet best, Mr. Trimble? This one with the seven baguet diamonds? Or if you think Mrs. Trimble would prefer a necklace, these pearls now---

TRIM:

No, she doesn't care for pearls.



CLERK:

Dear me, then of course the pearls are definitely out. The bracelet it is. There you are, all wrapped%u2026Oh, no, Mr, Trimble, put your checkbook away. The price of the bracelet, true, is a thousand dollars, but the cost of it is precisely nothing. To have the wife of Timothy T. Trimble wear jewelry from our shop -- we ask for nothing more!

MUSIC:

UP AND DOWN, MORE FANTASTIC AND FASTER

GIRL:

(SO CULTURED) The mink wrap is lovely, Mr. Trimble-- but I know Mrs. Trimble would prefer the chinchilla. I'm sure of it.

TRIM:

But don't chinchillas cost...

GIRL:

You must not worry about the cost, Mr. Trimble. Naturally we're making this a gift to you, for being the kind of man you are. And think how proud the chinchillas will be!

MUSIC:

UP AND DOWN

PERFUMER:

Oh, now, Mr. Trimble, I'm sure Mrs. Trimble can use

(HE OR SHE) more than just one bottle of perfume. So let's wrap up a dozen bottles, shall we%u2014all different? Then she'll

always have just the right scent to match her mood.

With our compliments, naturally.

MUSIC:

UP AND DOWN

SOUND:

(BACKGROUND OF S14ALL BUT EXCITED CROWD)

TRIM:

Benny, I can hardly walk...all those packages...fur coats...jewelry...perfume...cigars...smoking jackets.. I can't carry them. I ...Benny! All these people! What do they want?

SOUND:

(CROWD CLOSER)

BENNY:

It's okay, Trimble. They're just waiting to get a look at you. That's all.

ALL:

(A MOB SCENE) Lemme give you a hand, Mr. Trimble... One side, let Mr- Trimble, through...Gee, it really is Trimble,ain't it...Lemme help you, Mr. Trimble!... Who you shoving? I want to see Trimble!

TRIM:

Benny! They're shoving and crowding so...I can't move.. can't breathe...

VOICE:

Hey, Trimble, hold still a second!

SOUND:

(FLASHGUN AND CLICK OF SHUTTER)

VOICE; That's it. Thanks.

TRIM:

What was that?

BENNY:

Th' photographer for th' Associated Press. Tomorrow you'll see your pitcher in the paper. Some fun, huh?

TRIM:

No! These people--they're crushing me--

SOUND:

(COP'S WHISTLE, OFF)

OFFICER:

(OFP)Hey, what's going on here. Come on, now, break it up, break it up.

ALL:

(MOB SLOWLY DIES DOWN)

OFFICER:

Break it up, I say. On your way. (ON) Now what's all this about? Oh, so it's you, is.it! What're you peddling, brother?

TRIM:

Really, officer, I assure you I"

OFPICER:

Make it good, or I'll haul you in for creating a disturbance.

BENNY:

I'll handle this...Officer, this is Timothy T. Trimble,

from Brooklyn. You know, Trimble!

OFFICER:

Say, wait a sec! A inner voice is speakin' to me. Ain't you-

TRIM:

Trimble--Timothy T. Trimble.

OFFICER:

Of course! I knew it all along! Say, are these people bothering you? I'll run 'em all in!

TRIM:

No, but it's late and I'm trying to get back home, and%u2014

OFFICER:

Okay%u2014than lemme help you Into your car. Right here .at the curb.

TRIM:

But-that's not my car. It's a brand new Superior Eight. My car is that 1928 model down there,- - - .-

BEN:

Trimble,you disapernt me! When a man wins th' Christmas Spirits goodness award, he really wins something. This boat is all yours--delivered while you was inside th' store.

OFFICER:

(JUST OFF) Sure this is your car. Here's a card on th' steering wheel,.."Merry Christmas to the best man on earth from the best car on earth."

MAN:

(VERY TOUGH) Trimble! Oh, Trimble!

TRIM:

He's found me again!

MA.N:

Trimble! I want to talk to you!

GRPIOER:

Somebody you don't like, Mr. Trimble? I'll handle him for you......All right, buddy, on your way. On your way before I jug you!

MA.N:

One side, you! I'm an honest citizen and you can't order me around.

OFFICER:

Oh! Well, okay. Gee, he's a tough one, isn't he? (IN A SEMI-ASIDE)

MA.N:

Now, Trimble, what's the idea of running away from me?

TRIM:

I--well, I didn't see you and%u2014-

MAN:

Never mind about that now. Don't you know who I am?

TRIM:

You're -- from the Income tax bureau aren't you?

MAN:

The Income tax bureaul Trimble, I am Professor Question - Mark Question!

TRIM:

Professor Question? The one who gives away all those things on the radio?

MAN:

Exactly! And I've been trying to catch you all day to check on your entry in our Super-Duper Soap Contest. Just finish this sentence in twenty-five words or less: I like the new postwar Super-Duper soap best because.... Well, Trimble, finish the sentence. Surely you remember your own entry, don't you?

TRIM:

Well, yes, I do. "I like the new postwar Super-Duper Soap best because it has such a lovely smell I can always find it right away, even when I have soapsuds in my eyes and can't open them," ...Twenty five words exactly

MAN:

Trimble, congratulations 1 You have identified the winning entry, and thereby become our Super-Duper Jackpot Winner for 1947!

TRIMBLE:

I%u2014I have?

MAN; You have! And as our Super-Duper Jackpot Winner, you win a duplicate of every prize we've given away this year -%u2014 This four-thousand dollar automobile at the curb, a twenty-five thousand dollar home on Long Island, a ranch in New Mexico, a thirty-eight foot cabin cruiser, a four place, jet propelled airplane,

& two-thousand dollar mink coat, a five foot bookshelf of the world's great literature, a pair of gold-framed spectacles with which to read your five foot bookshelf of the world's great literature, two round trip tickets around the world, a two weeks vacation in Havana, all expenses paid, a complete set of dentists equipment, an X-ray machine, a silver-plated cement mixer, an (MORE)

MAN:

elevator, your own private Pullman car, a twelve carat diamond ring, and a gold-plated harmonica! Congratulations, Mr. Trimble--and Merry Christmas!

MUSIC:

CHRISTMASY, UP AND INTO SOMETHING LATE-AT-NIGHTISH, THEN OUT

BEN:

Well, Trimble, it's almost midnight. How've you enjoyed Christmas?

TRIM:

(SLEEPY) Huh? What'd you say?

BEN:

I said, how'd you like Christmas?

TRIM:

It's the kind of Christmas I always dreamed of, but never expected to have.

BEN:

That's what us Christmas Spirits had in mind---we wanted to see one good guy get for a change. Instead of always givin'. And did you get! Brother! It ain't everybody who wins the Super-Duper Jackpot, not to mention all the other stuff you collected.

TRIM:

(ANXIOUS) Benny, I'm not really dreaming all this, am I? It's not going to vanish when I wake up?

BEN:

How many times do I hafta tell you it's as real as Christmas, Trimble. Listen!

SFX:

(BLOWS DISCORDS ON HARMONICA)

That's the gold-plated harmonica you won. That's real, ain't it?

TRIM:

It certainly is. Please don't play it again, Benny.

BEN:

Okay, I'm just tryin' to convince you.

TRIM:

I'm convinced. I wonder what I'm going to do with the dentists instruments, the cement mixer and the elevator? Well, I'll think about that tomorrow. (YAWNS) I'm sleepy.

BEN:

You oughta be, the way you dipped into that brandy. But it's okay. Christmas only comes once a year, even in Brooklyn.

TRIM:

(DREAMY) I almost think the best present of all was the fact Aunt Agatha and Uncle Elmer and the children never got here because their car broke down...Oh, I'll never be able to face the other kind of Christmas again. Tips, presents, bills, relatives--it'll be too much for me.

BEN:

Never mind, you've had your day; they can't take that away from you. You see, Trimble, being good does pay-- some times.

TRIM:

I still don't see why I was given the award--but I won't argue about it.

LOUISE:

(COMES IN) Timothy, who are you talking to?

TRIM:

Just to%u2014-I mean, nr?body, my dear. I guess I was thinking out loud.

LOUISE:

I understand, darling. (SIGHS HAPPILY) Oh, Timothy, this has been the most wonderful day of my life.

TRIM:

(SLEEPY) Glad you enjoyed it, my dear.

LOUISE:

I don't think I ever realized before what a really good man you are. I just know there isn't a fine man in all the world.

TRIM:

Well, I'm glad you think so, sweetheart. (YAWNS) You don't mind if I go to sleep, do you? I'm pretty tired.

LOUISE:

Of course not....Oh, Timothy, it makes me so proud to be able to say to myself, "My husband, Timothy Thomas Trimble, is the finest man in the world."

TRIM:

(A MUMBLE) Thank you, dear.

LOUISE:

(FADES OFF) Sleep tight, darling. I'll be in a minute.

BEN:

Hey, Trimble!

TRIM:

Huh?

BEN:

She called you Timothy Thomas Trimble!

TRIM:

Yeah, 'ats right.

BEN:

You mean you ain't Timothy Timothy Trimble.

TRIM:

(HALF ASLEEP) No%u2014Timothy Thomas.

BEN:

Holy cow! Trimble, old pal, I hate to tell you this, but I've made kind of a mistake.

TRIM:

How's that?

BEN:

I've been giving th' Goodness Award for 1947 to the wrong guy I

TRIM:

What you say?

BEN:

Chum, I've made a mistake. You've had a Christmas that don't belong to you.

TRIM:

Can't hear you, Benny.

BEN:

Trimble, we got to start this whole day over again, before that clock can strike midnight.

TRIM:

What about th' clock?

BEN:

I hate to do this--but we got to go back to ten o'clock this morning and start all over again. This Christmas has got to be done over, and right, this time. So get set---here we go!

MUSIC:

WHIRLING, WITH SLIDE WHISTLE MAKING LONG CLIMB FROM LOW TO HIGH)

SOUND:

(CLOCK BEGINS TO STRIKE TEN AS MUSIC FADES OQT)

BEN:

Sorry, Trimble, but I had to do it.

TRIM:

Huh? What you say?

LOUISE:

(COMES IN FAST) Timothy, I said it's ten o'clock Christmas morning. You've got to get up! This is Christmas, and there's a thousand things to do.

TRIM:

Ten o'clock Christmas morning! But it can't be!

LOUISE:

It certainly is, and you've got to get up! You've got to help me!

TRIM:

Ten o'clock!. Oh, no, no! (FRANTIC) Benny, where are you? Come back%u2014please come back!

BENNY:

(JUST OFF) Sorry, Trimble, but I got to be going. (FADING) Got to do this whole thing over again.(WAY OFF) But Merry Christmas, Trimble...Merry Christmas!

LOUISE:

Now, Timothy! First you have to give the building employees their Christmas money.

MUSIC:

STARTS BEHIND AND COMES UP

LOUISE:

Then you have to buy presents for Uncle Elmer and Aunt Agatha and the children. Then you have to find a turkey. And after that....

MUSIC:

SWEEPS UP, ROLLICKING

M.T. And so comes to an end our special Christmas story, MR. TRIMBLE'S TURNABOUT CHRISTMAS.

EFX:

TRAIN WHISTLE, THEN MUSIC UNDER

M.T.:

Next week at this same time I'll be back again with another story of the strange and terrifying, which may chill you a little and thrill you a little, and entertain you for half an hour. I call it, ESCAPE TO NINETEEN EIGHTY, and it's about a man who fell asleep and woke up to find he'd slept for more than thirty years and....(DISAPPOINTED) Oh, you have to get off here%u2014I'm sorry. I hope we'll meet again. I take this train every week at this same time. And until then.... (MACABRE READING) Merry....Christmas!

SOUND:

(TRAIN WHISTLE FADES OFF)

MUSIC:

CURTAIN