Radio City Playhouse

Whistle, Daughter, Whistle

Date: Jul 31 1948


<span style="text-decoration: underline">CAST</span>:<br />
ANNOUNCER<br />
MRS. MARKS<br />
PEGGY, her daughter<br />
MRS. KALAT, her neighbor<br />
ALLEN, Mrs. Kalat's sonMUSIC: DRUM ROLL

ANNOUNCER: The National Broadcasting Company presents RADIO CITY PLAYHOUSE, Attraction Four.

MUSIC: ORCHESTRA ... THEME ... THEN OUT

ANNOUNCER: Tonight from the deft and versatile pen of Mr. Ernest Kinoy, a writer for whom our admiration grows with every passing week, we present "Whistle, Daughter, Whistle." Both Mr. Kinoy and our fine director friend Mr. Junkin have been giggling through most of the afternoon's rehearsal. It is their sincere hope -- and ours, too -- that you will giggle for the rest of the evening. In any case, garbed in calico and armed with a broom, RADIO CITY PLAYHOUSE presents Attraction Four -- "Whistle, Daughter, Whistle."

MUSIC: BRIGHT, GAY, ROLLICKING INTRODUCTION ... THEN BEHIND ANNOUNCER--

ANNOUNCER: (BRIGHTLY) Every Sunday morning "The New York Times" brings you four or five pages of sweet, smiling pictures with little stories underneath: "Ethel Glasgow Wed," or "Sue Potter Plans," or "Miss de la Veezay Betrothed"; and sometimes just (DULLY) "Jones hyphen Smith." Usually the pretty brides end up wrapped around salami sandwiches, or spread out on the kitchen floor as the weekly wash drips water down their news-print décolletées.

MUSIC: GROAN FROM THE BRASS SECTION

ANNOUNCER: But in Peggy Marks' house, the Sunday society pages last well into the week.

MUSIC: LOWER GROAN

ANNOUNCER: Peggy's mother saves them carefully.

MUSIC: AN EVEN LOWER GROAN

ANNOUNCER: Every night she spreads them out on the dining room table after supper. (FADES) Mrs. Marks loves weddings.

MRS. MARKS: (CLUCKS) Tsk, tsk, tsk. Did you see this one, Peggy? (NO ANSWER) Peggy!

PEGGY: Huh?

MRS. MARKS: I'm talking to you.

PEGGY: So?

MRS. MARKS: Did you read this one? (READS) "Southampton. Mr. and Mrs. Alistair Allen ..."

PEGGY: (WARNING) Ma ...

MRS. MARKS: (OBLIVIOUS) "... of New York, Southampton, and Miami, announce the engagement ..."

PEGGY: Ma, for crying out loud!

MRS. MARKS: (READS) "Graduate of the Spence School and Mount Holyoke." (TO PEGGY) Isn't that interesting?

PEGGY: Fascinating! Does it say what she got in Freshman English?

MRS. MARKS: I don't see it -- maybe further down.

PEGGY: Never mind, Ma.

MRS. MARKS: It says here she rides horses.

PEGGY: I'll bet. Ma, you got the tact of a brewery truck.

MRS. MARKS: Hm, did you ever notice? Always the rich girls get the rich boys; it's funny.

PEGGY: A scream.

MRS. MARKS: What's the matter with you tonight, Peggy? You don't feel well?

PEGGY: Why don't you lay off?

MRS. MARKS: What's the matter all of a sudden? I'm just reading the newspaper, that's all.

PEGGY: Always the wedding announcements. Do you ever read movie reviews to me? Or maybe the sports section?

MRS. MARKS: (DISMISSING IT) A coincidence.

PEGGY: Yeah, yeah.

MRS. MARKS: They all look so happy in the pictures.

PEGGY: Why don't you quit needling me?

MRS. MARKS: Needling? Who's needling? A mother has a right to worry; the clock don't run backwards.

PEGGY: All right, all right. So I'm practically brittle with age; I look like Lost Horizons. Ma, I'm only twenty-six; what's the rush? [Maybe I won't ever get married.

MRS. MARKS: (SHOCKED) Oh, Heaven forbid, you should knock on wood. (MRS. MARKS does.)

PEGGY: (SOFTER) Look, Ma, I know you mean well, but you don't give me any peace. Next thing I know you'll be leaving rice and old shoes around, for a hint.

MRS. MARKS: I want my daughter should be happy.

PEGGY: I know, Ma, and I guess I love you for it, but I do all right. I go to dances and I don't always end up by the wallpaper.

MRS. MARKS: Huh?

PEGGY: I mean] there are a couple of guys I like, and a couple of them like me. I'll get around to it.

MRS. MARKS: It should only be soon.

PEGGY: Oh, there you go again! Ma, I put in a hard day down at the office; from nine to five I look into wide open mouths while the doctor fills the teeth. Give me a rest when I get home, will ya?

MRS. MARKS: See? That's what I mean. If you had a nice husband, you wouldn't have to work so hard.

PEGGY: I should have known I can't win.

MRS. MARKS: (ELABORATELY CASUAL) You know, they say a dentist makes a pretty good living.

PEGGY: Hold it! Stop right there! Dr. Prentiss is forty-five; he's got a wife, three children, and flat feet. And on top of that, I don't think he likes me particularly.

MRS. MARKS: I didn't mean that dentist; I meant the other dentist.

PEGGY: What other dentist?

MRS. MARKS: The boy upstairs. He's just getting out of school this month. I met his mother over the washing machine in the basement. She has crouton curtains.

PEGGY: Sort of crummy, huh?

MRS. MARKS: What?

PEGGY: It's cre-tonne, Ma, cretonne. A crouton is bread.

MRS. MARKS: Crouton, cretonne -- it covers the windows. Where was I?

PEGGY: I won't talk.

MRS. MARKS: Oh, yes, the other dentist. He's a nice boy. I met him in the elevator.

PEGGY: Is that the curly-headed one that gets on at the fifth floor?

MRS. MARKS: 5-B. You noticed him?

PEGGY: (SEVERE) Ma, cut it out! I can smell a plot a mile away.

MRS. MARKS: I wouldn't say a word.

PEGGY: Okay, then, that's settled.

MRS. MARKS: (CLUCKS DOLEFULLY) Tsk, tsk, tsk.

PEGGY: (CHUCKLES, MORE FRIENDLY) Okay, Ma, I give up.

MRS. MARKS: What do you mean?

PEGGY: Come on, get your coat; we'll go to a movie, then have a soda. It's a murder picture with Humphrey Bogart by Loew's. There's a corpse every two minutes. That ought to get your mind off orange blossoms.

MUSIC: BRIDGE ... LOHENGRIN MARCH, INTO "THIS IS THE WAY WE WASH OUR CLOTHES"

SOUND: WASHING MACHINE RUNNING ... THEN IN BG--

MRS. KALAT: (COMING ON) Hello, Mrs. Marks. Washing again?

MRS. MARKS: Oh, hello, Mrs. Kalat.

MRS. KALAT: (SIGHS) Isn't it handy having a washing machine in the basement? Do you remember the old days?

MRS. MARKS: Do I? Don't talk! I still got a back-ache.

SOUND: WASHING MACHINE STOPS

MRS. MARKS: There, it's done. I'll be out in a minute.

MRS. KALAT: Don't hurry, Mrs. Marks. Rest yourself a while. That's what my boy always says, "Ma, rest yourself."

MRS. MARKS: (INNOCENT) Your son is in college?

MRS. KALAT: He graduates dental school next month.

MRS. MARKS: No! Isn't that nice? It's so nice to have a doctor in the family. I was telling my daughter Peggy, it's -- it's so nice to have a doctor in the family.

MRS. KALAT: A dentist.

MRS. MARKS: The same thing. You know, it's a real coincidence.

MRS. KALAT: You got a dentist?

MRS. MARKS: No, Peggy works for one.

MRS. KALAT: Oh, what do you know!

MRS. MARKS: Doctor Prentiss, downtown. But he's married.

MRS. KALAT: What?

MRS. MARKS: I mean -- she isn't happy working where she is. 

MRS. KALAT: Oh.

MRS. MARKS: My Peggy likes a position with advances.

MRS. KALAT: You know, Mrs. Marks, my boy Allen gets out of school next month and I-- Nnnnnno!

MRS. MARKS: What, Mrs. Kalat, what?

MRS. KALAT: No, it's silly.

MRS. MARKS: For Heaven sake, say it.

MRS. KALAT: Wouldn't it be interesting if--?

MRS. MARKS: Yea, yea?

MRS. KALAT: Well, he's going to start practicing right after. 

MRS. MARKS: Uh huh?

MRS. KALAT: An' he'll need a nurse in his office.

MRS. MARKS: (DISAPPOINTED) Oh. Now I see what you mean.

MRS. KALAT: It would be real convenient.

MRS. MARKS: It certainly would; maybe more.

MRS. KALAT: Why not, Mrs. Marks, why not? Your Peggy is a fine, sensible girl.

MRS. MARKS: She certainly is, Mrs. Kalat. I shouldn't say it about mine own, but if she was a perfect stranger I couldn't say no different.

MRS. KALAT: It's only fair.

MRS. MARKS: And independent, too. Honestly, the way some mothers would strangle a girl with apron strings -- a shame!

MRS. KALAT: I always say, "Live so you should let somebody else live, too."

MRS. MARKS: Ah, that's so true, Mrs. Kalat.

MRS. KALAT: Wait, Mrs. Marks, I just thought of something.

MRS. MARKS: Yes?

MRS. KALAT: My Allen said something about a dance for graduation.

MRS. MARKS: So?

MRS. KALAT: You know, it isn't that he hasn't always got a lot of girls chasing after him. A dentist is quite a catch.

MRS. MARKS: Of course, naturally.

MRS. KALAT: But I'm sure he'd just love to take your Peggy. 

MRS. MARKS: Well, you know, Mrs. Kalat, my Peggy is a very popular girl; she could have three or four real professional men, just like that. (SHE SNAPS HER FINGERS)

MRS. KALAT: Naturally, Mrs. Marks, of course. But maybe she would just happen to have a free evening?

MRS. MARKS: Hmm. It wouldn't be so easy, Mrs. Kalat. Like I said, my Peggy is awful independent.

MRS. KALAT: I'm not telling you no secrets, Mrs. Marks; my Allen is like a mule.

MRS. MARKS: When is the graduation dance?

MRS. KALAT: Next month.

MRS. MARKS: A month, huh? Well, that gives us plenty of time, don't it, Mrs. Kalat?

MRS. KALAT: It certainly does, Mrs. Marks.

MUSIC: "THIS IS THE WAY WE WASH OUR CLOTHES," INTO SHARP STABBING, OUT WITH--

PEGGY: Ouch!

MRS. MARKS: So stand still! You want the dress should fit, or no?

PEGGY: Fit? Ma, you're sewing me in so tight, I'll have to dance sideways.

MRS. MARKS: I want you should look your best. After all, you don't go to a graduation dance every night.

PEGGY: If I could help it, I wouldn't go at all.

MRS. MARKS: (CHIDES) Peggy!

PEGGY: I just want you to know that you're not getting away with anything.

MRS. MARKS: (INNOCENT) What are you talking about? Lift your arms higher.

PEGGY: I knew what you were doing. You been laying a trap for me for a month.

MRS. MARKS: Tsk, tsk, tsk. You should shame yourself.

PEGGY: All of a sudden, "Peggy, why don't you get a new dress?"

MRS. MARKS: Stand still.

PEGGY: "Peggy, why don't you get your hair done?"

MRS. MARKS: Don't you want to look nice?

PEGGY: Sure. You got me like a fly in a spider web. Like a rat in a trap.

MRS. MARKS: You could have said no.

PEGGY: After you told him on the phone I was dying to go? 

MRS. MARKS: That's what you said.

PEGGY: Ma, you know darn well that I said I'd die before I went.

MRS. MARKS: (DISMISSING IT) It's the same thing. Besides, you were in the shower; I couldn't hear.

PEGGY: All right, Ma, all right. You got me strapped into this banana peel you call a dress, and you got me roped into this collegiate brawl ...

MRS. MARKS: Put down the hands!

PEGGY: But I'm not going to like it.

MRS. MARKS: All right, don't like it. Breathe in.

PEGGY: If you zip that up the back, I'll never breathe out. 

MRS. MARKS: Don't be silly. 

SOUND: ZIPPER ALL THE WAY UP THE BACK

MRS. MARKS: There! Hah! You look so pretty!

PEGGY: [I wish you'd cut out this proxy man hunt, Ma. I don't even know the guy.

MRS. MARKS: I told you already. He's the boy upstairs on the fifth floor; he's a nice boy, and he's just graduating from dental school.

PEGGY: That's all I have to know. He'll probably spend all evening whispering sweet nothings about occlusions and amalgams.

MRS. MARKS: Now! Umph, you look real pretty.] Like a Cinderella.

PEGGY: At midnight I'll turn into a second molar. Well, where's young Doctor Kildare?

MRS. MARKS: He'll be here. You anxious?

PEGGY: Might as well get it over now, like an extraction. What did you say the young hopeful's name is?

MRS. MARKS: (WITH SATISFACTION) Allen Kalat. Dr. Allen Kalat. 

SOUND: DOOR BUZZER

PEGGY: Right on cue. Ma, you look like a cat that's been eating canary pie.

MRS. MARKS: Go on, there he is; don't keep him waiting.

PEGGY: Well, you answer it, Ma; I've got to put my face on straight.

MRS. MARKS: Honestly!

PEGGY: (HALF OFF) And Ma--?

MRS. MARKS: So?

PEGGY: (OFF) I'll dance with heaven's gift to the American bicuspid, but that's all -- understand? -- that's all!

SOUND: DOOR BUZZER

MRS. MARKS: Go already! (TO THE BUZZER) All right, all right ...

SOUND: DOOR BUZZER ... APARTMENT DOOR UNLATCHED, OPENS

MRS. MARKS: Come in, come in!

ALLEN: Mrs. Marks? I came for Peggy.

MRS. MARKS: Come in, come in; sit down a while; she's inside with her face.

SOUND: DOOR CLOSES

MRS. MARKS: Ahhhh! A regular full dress gentleman!

ALLEN: Between you and me, I -- rented it.

MRS. MARKS: It fits like a glove.

ALLEN: Yeah, too bad it's a suit, huh? (NERVOUS LAUGH AT HIS JOKE, WHICH TRAILS OFF AWKWARDLY)

MRS. MARKS: So-- So sit down! Oooh!

ALLEN: (STARTLED) What's the matter?

MRS. MARKS: You're squashing your tails.

ALLEN: Oh. Thanks.

MRS. MARKS: So have a piece of fruit, maybe a tangerine? 

ALLEN: No, thanks, I just had supper.

MRS. MARKS: I know, red cabbage. You could smell it all over the house.

ALLEN: Mom makes it sweet and sour.

MRS. MARKS: The best way. She uses vinegar for sour?

ALLEN: Lemon.

MRS. MARKS: Oh. Well, lemon is good, too. My Mama used to say--

PEGGY: (INTERRUPTS, COMING ON) What is this, a cooking school?

MRS. MARKS: Ohhh, Peggy. This is Dr. Kalat. Dr. Kalat, this is my Peggy; now go! Go have a real good time!

MUSIC: SOURLY OFF TO THE DANCE ... CHANGES TO SMALL TIRED AMATEUR FIVE-PIECE DANCE BAND PLAYING "DINAH," MOSTLY DRUMS ... CONTINUES IN BACKGROUND--

SOUND: A LARGE DANCE CROWD ... THEN IN BG--

PEGGY: Well?

ALLEN: Huh?

PEGGY: I said, well.

ALLEN: Well what?

PEGGY: I don't know, just -- well.

ALLEN: Oh. (PAUSE) Peggy?

PEGGY: Huh?

ALLEN: You -- want to dance?

PEGGY: Oh. Sure -- sure. (PAUSE) Er--?

ALLEN: Somethin' wrong?

PEGGY: You're standing on my dress.

ALLEN: (AWKWARD) Oh ... I'm ... sorry.

PEGGY: (UNHAPPY) Don't mention it.

ALLEN: (POINTEDLY) I said I was sorry.

PEGGY: (DISMISSIVE) Okay, okay. Let's dance.

ALLEN: Suits me.

PEGGY: (PAUSE, THEN IN PAIN) Oooh!

ALLEN: Oh, I'm sorry!

PEGGY: (SHARP BREATH INTAKE)

ALLEN: [Oh -- my fault.

PEGGY: It's all right.]

ALLEN: It's crowded here. Maybe - maybe we should have come earlier.

PEGGY: I don't know. It looks like a long evening the way it is.

ALLEN: [Ooops -- sorry.

PEGGY: Don't mention it.]

MUSIC: DRUMMER FINISHES THE SONG LOUDLY ... SWITCH TO BRIDGE ... LIMPING AND TIRED WALTZ FOR STRINGS, "THREE O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING" ... CUTS ABRUPTLY--

SOUND: APARTMENT DOOR UNLOCKS, OPENS, CLOSES ... PEGGY'S STEALTHY FOOTSTEPS

MRS. MARKS: (OFF) Peggy? [(PAUSE) Peggy?]

PEGGY: Yeah, Ma?

MRS. MARKS: (OFF) So how was it?

PEGGY: I'll tell you tomorrow, Ma.

MRS. MARKS: (OFF) Tomorrow? All night I didn't close my eyes! Come in here!

PEGGY: Look, I'm tired. Can't I just--?

MRS. MARKS: (COMING ON) All night I didn't sleep a wink -- not a pussy nap!

PEGGY: (SIGHS, RELENTS) All right, Ma.

MRS. MARKS: Turn on the light.

PEGGY: Wait 'til I get my coat off.

SOUND: LIGHT SWITCH CLICKS

PEGGY: (SIGHS) Now -- what is it?

MRS. MARKS: Now sit down on the bed. 

SOUND: BEDSPRINGS CREAK

PEGGY: Whew! Oh, my feet... [(THUMP! SHOE HITS FLOOR) I thought I'd need a cold chisel to get that off.

MRS. MARKS: So drop the other one. (ANOTHER THUMP)

PEGGY: (WEARY) Well?]

MRS. MARKS: You danced?

PEGGY: I danced.

MRS. MARKS: A record or a real band?

PEGGY: Five pieces -- all you could hear was the drum.

MRS. MARKS: Hah, a real fine affair! Did you go in a taxi? 

PEGGY: Yup. Young Dr. Kalat flinched every time the meter jumped.

MRS. MARKS: (CONFIDENTIAL) So how did you like him?

PEGGY: In detail, or a rough sketch?

MRS. MARKS: Honestly, Peggy, sometimes I get so aggravated I could--

PEGGY: (INTERRUPTS) You get aggravated!

MRS. MARKS: Peggy, before I bust -- just tell me, I wouldn't ask any more.

PEGGY: Well?

MRS. MARKS: Did you have a good time?

PEGGY: No!

MRS. MARKS: Let me put it this way--

PEGGY: I don't care which way you put it.

MRS. MARKS: (TENTATIVELY) He's a nice boy.

PEGGY: I warned you before I went, Ma. Why can't you grow up? It's not your business to pick out a husband for me. This isn't the middle ages.

MRS. MARKS: My Mama fixed it so I should meet your papa -- rest his soul. You're better than me?

PEGGY: Oh, that isn't it, and you know it.

MRS. MARKS: What more would you want? That Allen is a nice boy.

PEGGY: (WARNING) Ma!

MRS. MARKS: Even good looking. So what's glasses? On a doctor, they look distinguished.

PEGGY: (WEARY) I'm not going to sit up all night to listen to this.

MRS. MARKS: Who's keeping you? (POINTEDLY) Only such a boy you should get!

PEGGY: Look, Ma, my feet hurt, the zipper's jammed on my dress, I got to get up early tomorrow, and I'm sick and tired of your nagging all the time, "Peggy, get married." So quit!

MRS. MARKS: (INNOCENT) What did I say?

PEGGY: (DISBELIEF) Oh, no!

MRS. MARKS: I keep quiet all the time -- like a clam I keep still.

PEGGY: I'll never learn.

MRS. MARKS: To my grave I'll go without a word; no one should know my daughter talks like a knife in my heart.

PEGGY: Aw, please, Ma--

MRS. MARKS: A dentist isn't good enough? You want a millionaire, maybe?

PEGGY: I'll let you know in the morning.

SOUND: BEDSPRINGS CREAK

PEGGY: (MOVING OFF) Good night, Ma.

MRS. MARKS: Peggy--?

PEGGY: (OFF) What now?

MRS. MARKS: You're sure maybe you didn't like him -- just a little bit?

MUSIC: EXASPERATED BRASS ... FOR A BRIDGE

SOUND: STREET NOISE ... CITY TRAFFIC, HORNS, ET CETERA ... THEN IN BG

MRS. KALAT: Hello, Mrs. Marks, you've been shopping?

MRS. MARKS: Ah, hello, Mrs. Kalat. I just wheeled the wagon all the way from Broadway.

MRS. KALAT: You shop by the Super Market?

MRS. MARKS: Since I got the grocery wagon. Such an invention! It's almost a pleasure.

MRS. KALAT: Such a big load! Oooh, Mrs. Marks, Mocha Mousse Mix?

MRS. MARKS: I don't even know what it is, honest; in the Super Market I just can't keep my hands off the shelves.

MRS. KALAT: (CHUCKLES) With me the same. If it's self-service, I buy like I'm moving to a desert island.

MRS. MARKS: You're waiting for somebody?

MRS. KALAT: Just standing; it's so nice out. In my apartment we get sun ten minutes between five and five-thirty -- it's a novelty.

MRS. MARKS: We got a southern exposure in the living room.

MRS. KALAT: You're lucky.

MRS. MARKS: Lucky? Say listen, Mrs. Kalat, in the summer it's so hot you could fry an egg on the carpet.

MRS. KALAT: You can't have your cake with frosting, too, I always say.

MRS. MARKS: You're right, you're right.

MRS. KALAT: Like for example, Mrs. Winter.

MRS. MARKS: You heard?

MRS. KALAT: Have I heard? It isn't enough her son and daughter-in-law have to live with her; but that woman wouldn't even let them go by the movies alone.

MRS. MARKS: I saw. Always the mama -- it could drive a couple crazy.

MRS. KALAT: Such interference -- tsk, tsk -- honest, some people!

MRS. MARKS: It shouldn't be you and me, Mrs. Kalat.

MRS. KALAT: Such an idea!

MRS. MARKS: I know it's foolish.

MRS. KALAT: (STAMMERS) Er, pardon me, Mrs. Marks, but--

MRS. MARKS: What is it, Mrs. Kalat?

MRS. KALAT: Well, I suppose I shouldn't ask.

MRS. MARKS: Ask -- ask!

MRS. KALAT: Your Peggy, she had a good time last night?

MRS. MARKS: A good time? Ohhh, Mrs. Kalat!

MRS. KALAT: Did she?

MRS. MARKS: She woke me up when she came in -- honestly, I thought she was crazy -- she had such a good time, she was laughing and singing like it was her first party!

MRS. KALAT: Honest?

MRS. MARKS: Look, I shouldn't tell you, I promised with a cross-my-heart, I wouldn't tell.

MRS. KALAT: Mrs. Marks, we're old friends, you wouldn't tell me?

MRS. MARKS: Did I say I wouldn't?

MRS. KALAT: So what was it?

MRS. MARKS: My Peggy told me--

MRS. KALAT: Uh huh?

MRS. MARKS: You shouldn't breathe a word.

MRS. KALAT: Like a tomb.

MRS. MARKS: She said-- (EMBARRASSED) Ach, I can't.

MRS. KALAT: Honestly, Mrs. Marks!

MRS. MARKS: She said she-- She never met a boy like your Allen before.

MRS. KALAT: She didn't!

MRS. MARKS: (CONSCIENCE-STRICKEN) Well, not in so many words.

MRS. KALAT: That's very interesting, Mrs. Marks, very interesting.

MRS. MARKS: And your Allen -- how did he like -- er -- the dance?

MRS. KALAT: Well--

MRS. MARKS: He told you?

MRS. KALAT: My Allen tells me everything.

MRS. MARKS: Of course, of course.

MRS. KALAT: Naturally a boy like Allen is very careful -- so many girls keep throwing themselves at a professional man -- oh, I don't mean your Peggy, Mrs. Marks.

MRS. MARKS: No offense, Mrs. Kalat.

MRS. KALAT: So where was I?

MRS. MARKS: About Allen.

MRS. KALAT: Oh-oh-oh. Well-- Well, I wouldn't be surprised -- maybe it's a little soon, but I wouldn't be surprised-- (TRAILS OFF)

MRS. MARKS: No!

MRS. KALAT: Why not? Well, Mrs. Marks, I got to go upstairs.

MRS. MARKS: Is the elevator fixed?

MRS. KALAT: It was out again?

MRS. MARKS: I had to walk downstairs. Honestly, I never feel safe since they put in that automatic elevator.

MRS. KALAT: I get cold shivers every time that door closes; it's like a coffin standing up.

MRS. MARKS: Mark my words, Mrs. Kalat, somebody someday's going to get caught in that elevator.

MRS. KALAT: It shouldn't only be us, Mrs. Marks; knock on wood.

MUSIC: ORCHESTRA MIMICS KNOCKS ON WOOD ... FOR A TRANSITION

SOUND: FOOTSTEPS IN HALL, IN AGREEMENT WITH--

ALLEN: (OFF) Hey, hold that elevator, will ya?

PEGGY: Well, hurry up, I'm dropping the eggs.

SOUND: CRINKLE OF PAPER PARCEL

ALLEN: (APPROACHES) Oh, it's you, huh? Let me take your parcel.

PEGGY: Thanks.

SOUND: STEP INTO ELEVATOR

PEGGY: Five?

ALLEN: Right.

PEGGY: (PUSHES BUTTONS) Five -- and six. 

SOUND: ELEVATOR DOOR CLOSES ... WHIR! OF SLOW-MOVING ELEVATOR ... THEN IN BG

ALLEN: Nice out.

PEGGY: It'll do.

SOUND: WHIRRING STOPS

ALLEN: What's the matter now?

PEGGY: It's stuck.

ALLEN: (UNHAPPY) Noooooo--

SOUND: ALLEN BANGS ON DOOR

PEGGY: Well, that won't help.

ALLEN: Well, what do you do?

PEGGY: You might push the emergency button. It's the red one.

ALLEN: Oh, yeah.

SOUND: TWO SECONDS OF THE EMERGENCY BELL RINGING FROM FAR OFF

ALLEN: Now what?

PEGGY: We wait till Mr. Hector comes back from his pinochle game, and gets us out.

ALLEN: Hey, I can't stay in here; I'll be late for the clinic.

PEGGY: Those unfilled incisors will just have to wait.

ALLEN: I can't figure you out.

PEGGY: Do you have to?

ALLEN: Here you go all around Robin Hood's barn trying to get me to take you to that dance, and then you keep needling me all the time.

PEGGY: Wait a minute! I tried to get you to take me?

ALLEN: My mother said that the very least thing I could do is--

PEGGY: Hold it!

ALLEN: What's the matter?

PEGGY: I begin to smell a maternal rat.

ALLEN: I don't get it.

PEGGY: Your mother told you I wanted a date?

ALLEN: She said it would be a blessing to take you.

PEGGY: Uh, huh. You should have heard my mother: "He's such a shy boy; do a good deed for once."

ALLEN: Me? Shy?!

PEGGY: Like a violet, she said.

ALLEN: (AMUSED) Oh-- Ha! I'll be doggoned.

PEGGY: Yeah, that makes two of us.

ALLEN: Oh-- But why?

PEGGY: Well, I don't know about you, but my mother will walk the earth like the ghost of Hamlet's father until I-- Well, get married.

ALLEN: Oh.

PEGGY: What's the matter? You're turning green.

ALLEN: Every time I go out with a girl, my mother wants to know her family tree down to the roots.

PEGGY: Allen, my boy, I feel the hounds closing in.

ALLEN: (CHUCKLES, REALIZES) That's why you were sore the other night. (CHUCKLES)

PEGGY: (CHUCKLES, THEN SERIOUS) After the dancing, I had other reasons.

ALLEN: (CHARMINGLY APOLOGETIC) Er-- Yeah, I'm pretty bum at it -- two left feet.

PEGGY: (BEAT, GENEROUS) I've seen worse.

ALLEN: You know, I was kind of mad myself. Last time my mother shanghaied me into one of those things, the girl out-weighed me fifty pounds.

PEGGY: (CHUCKLES) The last one I had palmed off on me turned out to be married; claimed his wife didn't understand him.

ALLEN: Yeah? What happened?

PEGGY: I walked home from Tremont Avenue.

ALLEN: (SYMPATHETIC) Ohhh. (PAUSE, EXHALES) How long do you figure we'll be stuck in here?

PEGGY: Depends on the meld.

ALLEN: The what?

PEGGY: The meld -- the score in Mr. Hector's pinochle game. 

ALLEN: (WITH EFFORT, AS HE SITS) Well, I'm going to sit on the floor. Care to join me, Peggy?

PEGGY: Well, okay.

SOUND: THEY EXHALE AND MURMUR AS THEY SIT TOGETHER ... LONG PAUSE

PEGGY: Read any good books lately? 

ALLEN: Hmm?

PEGGY: Never mind.

ALLEN: Okay, okay. Funny, isn't it? I mean after all that finagling to get us together, we end up stuck in the elevator.

PEGGY: (CHUCKLES) My mother would call it real romantic.

ALLEN: (AGREEABLY) You know, it is, at that.

MUSIC: HAPPY BRIGHT ROMANTIC BRIDGE

PEGGY: Ma, I won't do it, and that's that!

MRS. MARKS: Go ahead, bite your nose.

PEGGY: It's ridiculous.

MRS. MARKS: What's ridiculous? You work for a dentist now; you could work for another dentist.

PEGGY: But I don't wanna--

MRS. MARKS: But, but, but nothing. Your Dr. Prentiss is all the way downtown.

PEGGY: It's silly.

MRS. MARKS: What's silly? The same money, and only four blocks away. Besides, he's such a nice boy.

PEGGY: That's what I mean.

MRS. MARKS: Listen, I had enough; I'm up to here! You're stuck in the elevator for two hours; finally he asks you to work in his new office, and what happens?

PEGGY: I say no!

MRS. MARKS: (EXHALES EXTRAVAGANTLY) What did I do to deserve such a daughter? 

PEGGY: I don't see what you're complaining about!

MRS. MARKS: Please, Peggy, let's talk calm; don't get excited.

PEGGY: Excited -- who's excited?

MRS. MARKS: Look, the boy asks you should work in his office, right?

PEGGY: Yeah.

MRS. MARKS: It's the same money, and it would save an hour every day from the subway.

PEGGY: I suppose so.

MRS. MARKS: So?

PEGGY: No!

MRS. MARKS: Nah!

PEGGY: And you know why.

MRS. MARKS: (INNOCENT) Why! There's a reason why? If I thought a hundred years, I couldn't find a reason.

PEGGY: I could. You angled me into that graduation dance with Allen, you and Mrs. Kalat. Now you're trying to haul me into that kid's office. I wouldn't be surprised if you pulled the plugs on that elevator!

MRS. MARKS: Such a thing to say!

PEGGY: Ma, you're subtle like a bulldozer.

MRS. MARKS: A what?

PEGGY: Never mind. You don't fool me for a minute. I bet you got the silver pattern all picked out.

MRS. MARKS: Nah, you talk foolish.

PEGGY: Maybe. Just remember, when I'm good and ready to get married, I'll pick myself out somebody; then I'll let you know. Honestly, Ma, you act like this was China or something.

MRS. MARKS: All right, all right. Forget I said anything. Go ahead, go downtown every morning on the subway in the rush hour; go ahead, get yourself mashed in like a sardine; come home with a black eye from somebody's elbow!

PEGGY: Oh, Ma, please--

MRS. MARKS: All right, be a dope! I wouldn't say another word!

PEGGY: I'll take odds.

MRS. MARKS: What?

PEGGY: Never mind, Ma. Only remember, I'm not going to work in Allen's office, you understand? Never!

MRS. MARKS: Sure, sure, never!

PEGGY: Okay! (CHANGES TONE AND SUBJECT) Now what's for dinner?

MUSIC: BRISK HAPPY BRIDGE

MRS. MARKS: Another piece of cake with your tea, Mrs. Kalat? It's right in the bread box.

MRS. KALAT: Thanks, no, Mrs. Marks, I ate already two.

MRS. MARKS: Two? You had four, but have another.

MRS. KALAT: I wouldn't dare; I'd bust right out of my dress.

MRS. MARKS: I always figure I use a saccharin tablet in the tea, so I can take all the cake I want. It's good; it's from O'Brien's.

MRS. KALAT: I always used to bake mine own cake.

MRS. MARKS: Me, too. But O'Brien's is good.

MRS. KALAT: My Allen always asks, "Ma, how come you don't bake no more?"

MRS. MARKS: When you got a man in the house, there's a reason to cook.

MRS. KALAT: Mmmm, I don't know -- my mister would be happy if I had only pot roast and potatoes -- maybe a chicken once in a while.

MRS. MARKS: You got trouble? Every day my Peggy changes her diet. Monday she's eating cottage cheese, Tuesday it's walnuts, Wednesday maybe whole wheat toast. It could drive a person crazy cooking lunch.

MRS. KALAT: Peggy comes home for lunch?

MRS. MARKS: For two weeks now, since she's working for your Allen.

MRS. KALAT: Allen doesn't even take off for lunch, he's working so hard.

MRS. MARKS: (CHUCKLES) Mrs. Kalat, I got a "T.L." for you from mine Peggy.

MRS. KALAT: So tell me.

MRS. MARKS: She says your Allen makes a better upper plate than anybody she ever saw -- real pretty.

MRS. KALAT: (MODESTLY) He's a good boy. He says your Peggy works real hard.

MRS. MARKS: They look nice together, don't they, Mrs. Kalat? 

MRS. KALAT: They certainly do, Mrs. Marks.

MRS. MARKS: So, Mrs. Kalat--?

MRS. KALAT: So--?

MRS. MARKS: What's next?

MUSIC: BRIDGE ... LOHENGRIN PLAYED LIKE A SHOSTAKOVICH POLKA

MRS. MARKS: (ECSTATIC) Thank Heaven, such a day I thought I'd never see!

PEGGY: Take it easy, Ma.

MRS. MARKS: Are you ready? Did you pack the new shoes?

PEGGY: Yes, Ma.

MRS. MARKS: And the fancy hat?

PEGGY: Everything's all in. Stop fussing, will ya?

MRS. MARKS: Who's fussing? Let's see, should be something borrowed -- and something with the blueing.

PEGGY: Blue, Ma, blue. Blueing's for the laundry.

MRS. MARKS: So what's wrong; for a wedding you shouldn't be clean?

PEGGY: (AMUSED) Oh, for Heaven's sake, will you sit down for a while? 

MRS. MARKS: Who can sit? A daughter only gets married once in a while!

PEGGY: This one nearly didn't.

MRS. MARKS: (GASPS EXTRAVAGANTLY IN MOCK SHOCK)

PEGGY: Honest, Ma, the only reason I turned Allen down three times was because I knew you were hovering around like a buzzard waiting for a carcass.

MRS. MARKS: A buzzard you call your own mother? For shame!

PEGGY: I'm not kidding. When I saw that triumphal grin of yours, I came close to calling the whole thing off. (SLOWLY, QUIETLY) Except, I guess I sort of love the guy.

MRS. MARKS: (WARMLY) Of course. I always knew my Peggy would pick out a good boy. Such a smart girl you were. I remember when you recited at the P.S. Graduation-- (SNIFFLES)

PEGGY: (ALSO WARMLY) Oh, cut it out, will you, Ma? You'll have time to cry later.

MRS. MARKS: A wedding. My David, rest his soul, should be here.

PEGGY: Yeah, I guess it would be nice.

MRS. MARKS: I always say it's nice to have a doctor in the family.

PEGGY: A dentist.

MRS. MARKS: Dentist -- doctor -- he wears a white coat.

PEGGY: So does a barber. Only remember, Ma, I'm marrying him in spite of you, not because.

MRS. MARKS: Naturally, naturally. Just so you're marrying him some way, that's enough for me.

PEGGY: Well, congratulations, Ma! You've earned them.

MRS. MARKS: Me?

PEGGY: Nobody else. Thank heaven that's the last of it. (POINTEDLY) Ma, you can rest now!

MUSIC: MENDELSSOHN PLAYED LIKE "BUCKLE DOWN, WINSOCKI" ... THEN SLOWS TO NORMAL AND FINISHES GRANDLY

MRS. KALAT: (NEAR TEARS) A beautiful wedding, Mrs. Marks. 

MRS. MARKS: (THE SAME) Lovely, Mrs. Kalat, lovely.

MRS. KALAT: It's a blessing to see a boy should get a nice smart girl like your Peggy.

MRS. MARKS: A match, Mrs. Kalat, a match. Your Allen will go far. 

MRS. KALAT: Thank you!

MRS. MARKS: It's a load off my mind. Confidentially, I can tell you now--

MRS. KALAT: A secret?

MRS. MARKS: Not that I'd be interfering with Peggy -- ach, never.

MRS. KALAT: Neither me, Mrs. Marks. Always with Allen, his own way.

MRS. MARKS: But honest, Mrs. Kalat, sometimes I thought my Peggy would end up an old maid -- such a stubborn girl -- stubborn, Mrs. Kalat.

MRS. KALAT: You think maybe it was easy with mine Allen? Not interfering ever!

MRS. MARKS: Nah, never!

MRS. KALAT: But honestly, I'm not forgetting times I wanted to shake that fine dentist like a mop out the window.

MRS. MARKS: So right, Mrs. Kalat. 

MRS. KALAT: Yes.

MRS. MARKS: Don't I know? Well, it's done now.

MRS. KALAT: (BEAT, A LITTLE SADLY) All over.

MRS. MARKS: All over? All over?! Wait, Mrs. Kalat, wait -- it's just beginning!

MUSIC: LOHENGRIN ... FOR A BIG CURTAIN ... THEN OUT

ANNOUNCER: You have just heard "Whistle, Daughter, Whistle" as written by Ernest Kinoy and directed by Harry W. Junkin. Our two lovable mamas, Mrs. Kalat and Mrs. Marks, were played by Lenore Garland and Mildred Clinton. Peggy was Jean Tatum; Allen, Lamont Johnson. The music was composed and conducted by Dr. Roy Shield. RADIO CITY PLAYHOUSE is supervised for the National Broadcasting Company by Richard P. McDonough.

MUSIC: THEME ... THEN IN BG

ANNOUNCER: Next week, RADIO CITY PLAYHOUSE will offer another script by our director, Harry W. Junkin. It is the story of Hilda Bradley and a letter -- a dangerous and a foolish letter. It is titled "Special Delivery" and because we feel sure you'll enjoy it, we invite you most sincerely to join us. That's "Special Delivery," next week, Attraction Five, RADIO CITY PLAYHOUSE.

MUSIC: THEME, UP TO FILL A PAUSE ... THEN OUT BEHIND--

ANNOUNCER: This is NBC, the National Broadcasting Company.

MUSIC: NBC CHIMES