Generic Radio Workshop Script Library (BACK)

Series: Gunsmoke
Show: Hinka-Do
Date: Oct 10 1952

CAST:
ANNOUNCER
MATT DILLON, U. S. marshal
DOC, the gleefully morbid, gossip-loving doctor
CHESTER, Matt's reliable deputy
MAMIE, saloon owner
FINNEGAN, bartender
MANUEL
HERMAN, former saloon owner
MISS ADAMAE (1 line)
TOM (1 line)
1ST MAN (2 lines)
2ND MAN (1 line)
DRUNK, inebriated saloon customer
CURLEY (1 line)
and various CROWDS

SOUND:

GALLOPING HOOFBEATS APPROACH ... GUNSHOT! RICOCHET!

MUSIC:

INTRO

ANNOUNCER:

Around Dodge City and in the territory on West, there's just one way to handle the killers and the spoilers - and that's with a U. S. Marshal and the smell of - GUNSMOKE!

MUSIC:

THEME ... THEN BEHIND ANNOUNCER--

ANNOUNCER:

GUNSMOKE - starring William Conrad, the story of the violence that moved west with young America - the story of a man who moved with it -- Matt Dillon, United States Marshal.

MUSIC:

MAIN TITLE

SOUND:

STREET BACKGROUND (HORSE NEIGHS, ET CETERA) ... MATT'S FOOTSTEPS AS HE WALKS DOWN STREET

ADAMAE:

Mornin', Mr. Dillon.

MATT:

Mornin', Miss Adamae.

SOUND:

MORE WALKING

TOM:

Hiya, Marshal.

MATT:

Good morning, Tom.

SOUND:

MORE WALKING

DOC:

(OFF, CALLS) Hey, Matt! Wait a second!

MATT:

What? Oh, how ya, Doc?

SOUND:

MORE WALKING ... DOC'S HURRIED FOOTSTEPS TO MATT WHO STOPS

DOC:

(CLOSER, BREATHLESS) On my way over to the jail, after you.

MATT:

Oh?

DOC:

You heard about the Longhorn?

MATT:

No, what about it?

DOC:

(CHUCKLES) You haven't heard or you wouldn't ask.

MATT:

Well, heard what, Doc?

DOC:

Well, ummm, uh-- I'll walk along with you, if you're heading that way.

MATT:

Well, as a matter of fact, I was heading that way.

SOUND:

MATT AND DOC'S FOOTSTEPS

MATT:

Hey, what's all that crowd out in front there for?

DOC:

(CHUCKLES) In due time, Matt. In due time.

MATT:

You know, Doc, there's only one thing that makes you happier than having a secret and that's to collect your coroner's fee.

DOC:

(WITH RELISH) Yeah. Might get a fee out of this, too, 'fore it's over.

MATT:

No wonder you're all worked up.

NOTE:

1ST MAN & 2ND MAN ARE OVERHEARD IN PASSING, FROM MATT'S PERSPECTIVE--

1ST MAN:

Hey, have you heard about the Longhorn?

2ND MAN:

What?

1ST MAN:

It's the doggonedest thing I ever come across.

SOUND:

MATT AND DOC'S FOOTSTEPS, JOINED BY CHESTER'S

CHESTER:

Morning, Mr. Dillon.

MATT:

Oh, hiya, Chester.

CHESTER:

Say, you heard about the Longhorn?

MATT:

(ANNOYED) No! No, Chester I have not heard about the Longhorn.

CHESTER:

What?

DOC:

(AMUSED) He's upset, Chester. He's the only man in Dodge who hasn't heard.

MATT:

Look, so help me, Doc, if this is one of your practical jokes--

DOC:

No, no, no, no, no, I had nothing to do with it. (CHUCKLES) You'll see.

SOUND:

THEIR FOOTSTEPS TO MURMURING CROWD ... VOICES BABBLE AS MATT PUSHES THROUGH CROWD

MATT:

Uh, will you pardon me, ma'am?

DOC:

Let him through.

MATT:

Pardon me, please.

DOC:

Let me through, please.

MATT:

Excuse me.

SOUND:

CROWD MURMURS A MOMENT ... THEN GROWS QUIET WITH--

CHESTER:

Well, Mr. Dillon?

DOC:

(BEAT) What do you think of it, Matt? Aside from the misspelled words.

MATT:

The Longhorn been closed all morning?

DOC:

Yep. Locked tight. That sign was on the door at daylight.

MATT:

(READS) "The Longhorn Saloon will open at eight o'clock tonight with new management and a new policy. Everybody welcome. Signed, the new manager, Mamie."

DOC:

Mamie. That's a woman, Matt.

MATT:

(READS) "Lately of Kansas City, St. Louis, and points east."

CHESTER:

Well, I don't know, Mr. Dillon. My! We never had a woman running a saloon in Dodge City before.

MATT:

And we won't now, Chester. The boys won't let her last an hour, I'm afraid.

DOC:

(CHUCKLES) Be kind of fun for that hour, though.

MATT:

And another thing, if this Mamie is the new manager, what's happened to Herman Bleeker?

DOC:

Well, I don't know. He must have sold it to her.

MATT:

He didn't say anything about it yesterday morning.

CHESTER:

That's right. I saw him over at the livery stable in the afternoon showing off one of them fancy vests he's always ordering. And he never said one word about it.

DOC:

Well, you know that little popinjay. He's flighty. Probably happened sudden.

MATT:

Yeah, too sudden, Doc -- even for Herman.

CHESTER:

Say, come to think of it, I haven't seen him all morning and he's usually struttin' up and down Front Street, preening himself like a pouter pigeon.

DOC:

Yeah. He's probably upstairs there, sleeping in, getting ready for the opening tonight.

CHESTER:

We gonna be here, Mr. Dillon?

MATT:

(MUSES, TO HIMSELF) Mamie, huh?

CHESTER:

Mr. Dillon?

MATT:

What? Oh. Yeah, Chester. We're gonna be here.

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

SOUND:

SALOON BACKGROUND ... PIANO AND A MILDLY ANNOYED CROWD

FINNEGAN:

I'm sorry, boys, but she's upstairs. Said she'd be down about eight o'clock, and that's all I know about it. Now, if you want to order anything, let's hear it. And if you don't, just shut up.

CHESTER:

Say, the boys are acting kind of rambunctious, Mr. Dillon.

MATT:

Yeah. Sure wish she'd stayed in St. Louis -- and points east.

DOC:

(APPROACHES, EXCITED) Say, Matt! Matt, I was talking to the bartender. I asked him what she looks like -- and he said if he told me, I wouldn't believe it.

MATT:

The fellow I'd like to talk to is Herman Bleeker.

DOC:

Yeah. Well, nobody's seen hide nor hair of him. You know, Matt, I'm beginning to wonder, too.

MAMIE:

(TO ALL) Howdy, strangers!

SOUND:

CROWD SETTLES DOWN TO LISTEN

MUSIC:

SALOON PIANIST GIVES HER A LITTLE FANFARE BEHIND--

MAMIE:

Welcome to the Longhorn! I'm Mamie, the new owner!

DOC:

(STUNNED, LOW, TO MATT & CHESTER) Uh-- Mamie--?

CHESTER:

My gracious sakes alive.

MATT:

A hundred and ninety pounds if she weighs an ounce.

DOC:

The bartender was right. I wouldn't have believed it.

MAMIE:

(TO ALL) Boys, looks like we're going to be doin' business together so let's get things straight right in the beginning! Now in the first place, the minute you stick your foot inside that door you're on my stomping ground! I'm the boss of this shebang and don't you ever forget it! When I tell anybody to hop, he hops! Is that clear?!

SOUND:

CROWD REACTS SOMEWHAT SKEPTICALLY

MAMIE:

Now, I tell you what, I aim to give the squarest deal in town! All the liquor here is gonna be aged over thirty days and the dancing girls aged under thirty years!

SOUND:

CROWD REACTS

MAMIE:

The liquor's straight and the girls are graceful! There's only four aces in every deck and the cards only read from the front side!

DRUNK:

(OFF, MUMBLES DRUNKENLY) Talks too much--

MAMIE:

You'll get a fair shake for your money, but there ain't gonna be no fandangling! And another thing--

DRUNK:

(OFF, SCOFFS) Dingle, dingle, dangling--

MAMIE:

(SCREECHES HORRIBLY) Mister! I'm talking!

DRUNK:

Well, so am I, you old battle-axe.

MAMIE:

Excuse me, boys.

SOUND:

MAMIE'S FOOTSTEPS TO DRUNK

CHESTER:

(LOW) Uh oh. Looks like it's started, Mr. Dillon.

DILLON:

(LOW) Yeah. Wait a second.

MAMIE:

(TO FINNEGAN) He paid for his drink?

FINNEGAN:

Yes, ma'am.

MAMIE:

(TO DRUNK) All right, you wall-eyed old maverick! Come on!

DRUNK:

(HOLLERS)

SOUND:

SCREAMING, LAUGHING, SCUFFLING ... AS MAMIE BEATS UP THE DRUNK AND TOSSES HIM OUT OF THE SALOON TO THE CROWD'S DELIGHT

MAMIE:

Throw his hat out after him!

SOUND:

CROWD LAUGHS HEARTILY ... THEN SETTLES DOWN BEHIND--

MAMIE:

Now, as I was saying boys, I just won't stand for no fandangling. Now, maybe some of you figured I was wearing this six-shooter for a decoration. Well now, just cast your eyes on that Ace of Spades I got tacked up on the back wall. Now!

SOUND:

GUN SHOT! ... AND CROWD'S ASTONISHED REACTION

DOC:

For the land's sakes--! Did you see that draw, Mr. Dillon?

DILLON:

Yeah, and she got the card, too.

DOC:

Oh, the boys won't give her no trouble, Matt.

MAMIE:

All right boys, the first one's on the house! And it's the last free one you'll get! And the only credit I give is for funeral expenses. (BEAT) Belly up, boys!

SOUND:

CROWD REACTS WITH ENTHUSIASM, COMPLETELY WON OVER ... SALOON BACKGROUND RESUMES (PIANO RESUMES, GLASSES CLINK, ET CETERA)

CHESTER:

Well, sir, Mr. Dillon?

MATT:

Chester, I want to talk to Herman Bleeker more than ever.

DOC:

Hey, you know, she's big enough to, ah-- Well, I bet she forced Herman to sell.

MATT:

Yeah, maybe. Doc, I'll be right back. I, er-- I want to talk to her.

SOUND:

MATT'S FOOTSTEPS TO MAMIE

MAMIE:

(IN MID-CONVERSATION) Ah, that shootin' was nothing, boys! (SEES MATT) Oh! You're the Marshal, huh?

MATT:

Yeah, that's right, ma'am. My name's Dillon.

MAMIE:

(WITH GUSTO) Proud to shake your hand, Mr. Dillon.

MATT:

Well, thank-- (WINCES) Thank you, Miss Mamie. Welcome to Dodge City.

MAMIE:

Mighty decent of you to express the sentiment, Marshal. I reckon you won't get much business around the Longhorn. I'll take care of any trouble that's around here.

MATT:

That would be quite a change. The boys used to push Bleeker around every now and then.

MAMIE:

Oh, that runty little prairie dog!

MATT:

I, uh-- I didn't know he was planning to sell, Miss Mamie. Must have made up his mind in a hurry.

MAMIE:

Yeah! I made him an offer and he took it. Just like that.

MATT:

He found himself some new living quarters, I suppose.

MAMIE:

Oh, yeah, he moved right out last night.

MATT:

Oh. Mm hm. I, uh-- I wonder where he's holed up.

MAMIE:

Huh?

MATT:

There are a couple of things I'd like to see him about.

MAMIE:

(UNCONVINCING) Well, now, er-- I tell you, I'm afraid he left town, Mr. Dillon. I think he said something about taking the Santa Fe to St. Louis, now that I remember.

MATT:

Oh. I see, I see. Well, that's too bad. I'd sure like to have seen him. Well, I'll probably drop in now and then, Miss Mamie.

MAMIE:

Sure, anytime, Marshal. For you, it's on the house!

MATT:

(NERVOUS CHUCKLE) Thank you.

SOUND:

MATT'S FOOTSTEPS BACK TO CHESTER AND DOC

CHESTER:

What'd you find out, Mr. Dillon?

MATT:

Let's get out of here, Chester. Comin', Doc?

DOC:

Sure! Oh, yes -- with both ears a-flappin'.

SOUND:

THEIR FOOTSTEPS OUT OF SALOON, THROUGH SWINGING DOORS, INTO NOCTURNAL BACKGROUND (CRICKETS, ET CETERA) ... THEY STROLL DOWN THE BOARDWALK

MATT:

(SIGHS) Well, boys -- what do you think of her?

CHESTER:

Oh, my gracious, Mr. Dillon, I sure would hate to meet her in the dark.

DOC:

Why, she's got a voice like a buffalo.

CHESTER:

Ain't it awful? It just itches your ears, don't it?

DOC:

Why, the woman's a human monstrosity.

MATT:

I still haven't seen Herman.

SOUND:

FOOTSTEPS STOP

DOC:

What did she say, Matt?

MATT:

She says she thinks he left town. Chester, I want you to check all the rooming houses and hotels along Front Street. I'm going to go to the railroad station and the stage lines. I'll meet you over at the jail.

CHESTER:

Yes, sir, Mr. Dillon.

DOC:

Say, Matt -- I think Herman keeps a horse over at the livery stables.

MATT:

Yeah, I thought of that, Doc. I wonder would you be good enough to look into that for me?

DOC:

Why, sure. Be happy to.

CHESTER:

(SLOWLY) You know, Mr. Dillon ---- she is a' awful straight shot.

MATT:

(UNHAPPILY) Yeah, Chester. I know.

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

SOUND:

DOC'S FOOTSTEPS ... FROM STREET INTO THE JAIL

DOC:

You here, Matt?

MATT:

Oh, uh-- Yeah, come on in, Doc.

SOUND:

DOC'S FOOTSTEPS IN

DOC:

Ah, well, his horse is still over at the stable. He didn't tell them anything about leaving.

MATT:

He didn't leave, Doc. Mamie came in on the nine o'clock train last night. Only one train out after that, around midnight. He wasn't on it. And he didn't buy a ticket on the stage either.

DOC:

Yes, see? Now what'd I tell you? Matt, that settles it!

MATT:

Yeah. 'Course he may have moved into one of the hotels.

CHESTER:

(APPROACHES) No, sir, Mr. Dillon, I'm afraid he didn't.

SOUND:

CHESTER'S FOOTSTEPS IN

MATT:

Oh, what'd you find out, Chester?

CHESTER:

That nobody in this town has seen Herman Bleeker since around nine o'clock last night.

DOC:

Matt, I knew I'd get me a fee out of this, one way or the other.

MATT:

Well, don't spend it yet, Doc.

MANUEL:

(CLEARS THROAT, OFF)

MATT:

What?

MANUEL:

(OFF) Buenos nachos, señors.

MATT:

Oh, Manuel. Come on in.

MANUEL:

Gracias, Señor Dillon.

SOUND:

MANUEL'S FOOTSTEPS IN

MATT:

Well, what's on your mind?

MANUEL:

Well, Señor, I was at the railroad depot when I hear you ask about the little one, er, Señor Bleeker.

MATT:

Oh?

MANUEL:

And the other, the Señora. Ooh, there is much woman in that one.

MATT:

(AMUSED) Well, there's no argument there, Manuel.

MANUEL:

Señor, last night I have see something which is strange.

MATT:

Oh?

MANUEL:

I am come home very late -- one hour, two hour before dawn. I was visit a friend, you understand.

MATT:

(AMUSED) Yeah. Yeah, I understand.

MANUEL:

You see, I am walk home in much hurry and it is really dark, Señor, when at once I see this lantern in the arroyo behind the Longhorn cantina.

DOC:

Oh, a lantern, you say?

MANUEL:

I am think, what is this? So I wait. And this lantern is come toward me and when it is close-- Oh, this woman -- who I have no see one like her -- Oh, what a scare!

MATT:

Well, what was she doing in the arroyo?

MANUEL:

I do not know, but - but is one thing I forget. She is carry something in her hand.

MATT:

(BEAT) Well, what was it, Manuel?

MANUEL:

A shovel, Señor.

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

SOUND:

NOCTURNAL BACKGROUND (CRICKETS, ET CETERA) ... MATT DIGS UP DIRT WITH A SHOVEL, GRUNTING WITH EFFORT NOW AND THEN

DOC:

Find anything, Matt?

MATT:

Well, there's something here, Doc, but I can't quite-- Hold the lantern over here, will you, Chester?

CHESTER:

Yes, sir, Mr. Dillon.

SOUND:

CHESTER SHIFTS POSITION IN DIRT

MATT:

I found something here; if I can just -- just get it loose.

CHESTER:

Lantern all right, Mr. Dillon? Can you see what 'tis?

MATT:

Yeah, it's fine, Chester.

SOUND:

SHOVELING STOPS BEHIND--

MATT:

Yeah, I got it.

CHESTER:

Oh.

MATT:

It's a boot. And - here's the other one.

DOC:

Yeah! All that fancy stitching. Matt, those are his. I've seen 'em on him.

MATT:

Yeah, so have I, Doc. Yesterday, in fact. Here, take 'em, Chester.

CHESTER:

Yes, sir.

MATT:

There's a bundle of some kind here.

DOC:

Oooh, you found the body, huh?

MATT:

No, it's clothes, I think, Doc. Let's have a look. Yeah. That's all there is, too. The hole doesn't go any deeper. That's hard pan on the bottom there. Hold the lantern down, Chester, and let me--

CHESTER:

All right.

MATT:

Let me get this unwrapped.

DOC:

I'm not so sure about that coat, Mr. Dillon. A lot of 'em like that around town.

MATT:

Yeah, I know. But take a look at this fancy vest.

DOC:

Ohhhh! That's Herman's! Nobody else in Dodge City'd ever wear a thing like that.

DILLON:

Well, from the looks of it, he won't be wearing it again.

MUSIC:

CURTAIN FOR ACT ONE

ANNOUNCER:

We will return for the second act of GUNSMOKE in just a moment. But first--

The escape car speeds from the scene of the crime and the victim notes its license number. Police investigating the case discover the car has an ironclad alibi. That just begins the excitement on tomorrow night's GANG BUSTERS program. It's "The Case of the Twice-Parked Car," an authentic crime story taken from actual police records. Don't miss GANG BUSTERS presented by CBS Radio tomorrow night over most of these same stations.

Now the second act of GUNSMOKE.

MUSIC:

SECOND ACT OPENING

SOUND:

CLINKING OF GLASS TUBES ... THEN IN BACKGROUND

MATT:

How ya coming, Doc?

DOC:

Don't rush me, Matt, don't rush me. I haven't made one of these blood tests in years. (CHUCKLES) If you ask me, I don't see any use in making one now. Well, let me see, pour the precipitin into here. What other kind of blood could it be except human?

MATT:

Doc, I only want to be sure, that's all.

DOC:

All right, all right. Now, let me see. Five drops of the sulfate. You sure look uncomfortable, Matt.

CHESTER:

Well, how'd you like to try arresting that lady, Doc?

DOC:

Not my job to arrest her. (CHUCKLES) All I'm doing is stopping up these loopholes Matt's trying to wiggle out of. (LAUGHS)

MATT:

Well, that's real decent of you, Doc, real decent.

DOC:

No, sir, Matt. I don't ever recall you being in such a predicament. Oh, of course I remember the night you shot it out with the Barkley Boys over in the Alafroganza. There were three of 'em -- and you did not turn a hair. And then that other time when you got dry-gulched by the Platte River gang.

MATT:

All right, Doc, all right, all right, but this is different. If I go to arrest that woman, she's just crazy enough to start a gunfight.

DOC:

Oh, it's a problem. It's a problem all right. Now, let's see, we'll just shake this up -- and warm it a bit.

SOUND:

SHAKES TUBE VIGOROUSLY, PLACES IT ON BURNER

DOC:

Yeah. Mm hm.

CHESTER:

You know, there is one thing, though, Mr. Dillon. Shootin' at a mark's not the same as a gunfight. Maybe she wouldn't even resist.

MATT:

Do you really believe that, Chester?

CHESTER:

No, sir. (MISERABLE) She ain't a woman -- she's a human catastrophe.

DOC:

(CHUCKLES) She sure is, for Matt.

MATT:

Well, there's still a chance we may be going off half-cocked here. That blood could have got on Herman's vest a dozen different ways.

DOC:

Well, we'll soon see. Uh, let's see now. Couple of drops of reagent. One, two, three, four. Ah! Yes, now. And we'll look for the color change. So -- turn up the lamp a little bit, will you, Chester, please?

CHESTER:

All right, Doc.

SOUND:

CHESTER RISES, MOVES TO LAMP

DOC:

(PLAYFUL PROLONGING) Ohhhh. Well-- (CHUCKLES) My. Mm hm, yes. Well--

MATT:

(IMPATIENT) Well, Doc?!

DOC:

Well, it's tough luck, Matt. (CHUCKLES) It's human blood.

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

SOUND:

NOCTURNAL BACKGROUND ... MATT, CHESTER AND DOC'S FOOTSTEPS

DOC:

Hey, Matt, I thought we was going over to the Longhorn and talk to Mamie. How come the jail?

MATT:

Ah, she'll keep, Doc. She's not going anywhere.

DOC:

Yeah, looks cut-and-dried to me, Matt.

MATT:

It might not if you were in my shoes. Ah, come on in, boys.

SOUND:

JAIL DOOR OPENS, THEIR FOOTSTEPS IN, DOOR CLOSES

CHESTER:

You know, Mr. Dillon, when I talked to the barkeep, Finnegan, he said that when he showed up this morning to open the saloon, that woman was already inside waiting for him. She told him to come back at eight o'clock tonight. And he didn't see no sign of Herman Bleeker.

DOC:

Oh, well, there's another nail in your coffin, Matt!

MATT:

Doc, if you keep this up I'm going to deputize you and take you along with me.

CHESTER:

He sure can have my job, Mr. Dillon.

DOC:

No, you don't. I will not lift a hand in anger against a woman. (LOW) Especially that woman.

MATT:

I keep thinking we could still be wrong somehow.

DOC:

A real die-hard, huh?

MATT:

(GRASPS AT STRAWS) Look, now suppose Herman hurt himself some way.

DOC:

How?

MATT:

And he wanted to get away by himself and - and recuperate.

DOC:

Where?

MATT:

And suppose he didn't want anybody to know about it.

DOC:

Why?

MATT:

So he decided to stay with some friend.

DOC:

Who?

MATT:

And-- Well, maybe-- (GIVES UP) Oh, come on, Chester, let's go.

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

SOUND:

SALOON BACKGROUND

MATT:

Ah, there she is at the end of the bar.

CHESTER:

What are you gonna do, Mr. Dillon?

MATT:

Take her in, Chester. Maybe she'll talk when she's arrested. I gotta get that gun away from her some way.

CHESTER:

It's not gonna be easy.

MATT:

It's gotta be done. I've never drawn a gun on a woman yet and I'm not starting now. If I could just manage to-- I don't know, there might be a chance. Stick close to me, Chester.

CHESTER:

Yes, Mr. Dillon.

SOUND:

MATT AND CHESTER'S FOOTSTEPS TO MAMIE

MAMIE:

Well, Marshal! Mighty glad you dropped back in!

MATT:

I was just wondering how you were getting along, Miss Mamie.

MAMIE:

Like a kid with two tongues and an all-day sucker! Say now, tell me, did you find that little weasel, Herman Bleeker?

MATT:

I, er-- I thought you told me he'd left town.

MAMIE:

Oh, well, I was just guessing, Mr. Dillon. He said something about planning to. Here, step up and have a shot of poison.

MATT:

Uh, no. No, thank you, thank you. As a matter of fact, I came back here for a particular purpose. Chester and I have a little bet on.

CHESTER:

(CONFUSED) Mr. Dillon, we--?

MAMIE:

What kind of a bet is it, Marshal?

MATT:

Well, it was about that shootin' trick of yours -- hittin' the center of that playing card, you know. Chester figures that it was a fluke of luck. He's bettin' me that you can't do it five times in a row.

MAMIE:

Well, we'll soon settle that. The card's still up there.

SOUND:

MAMIE'S FOOTSTEPS TO CENTER OF ROOM

MAMIE:

Stand aside, boys!

SOUND:

CROWD MURMURS A MILD REACTION

MAMIE:

Mamie's gonna limber up her shooting iron, so get out of the way!

SOUND:

CROWD PANICS A LITTLE AND CLEARS A SPACE FOR HER

MAMIE:

Get down there, Curley. (BEAT) All right.

SOUND:

GUN SHOT

MAMIE:

There's one.

SOUND:

GUN SHOT

MAMIE:

Couple of 'em.

MATT:

(IMPRESSED) You're doing fine so far.

SOUND:

GUN SHOT

MAMIE:

How we doing down there, boys?

CURLEY:

(OFF) All dead center so far.

MAMIE:

(TO CHESTER) Say, uh, you there -- whatever your name is -- what do you think of your bet now?

CHESTER:

(STAMMERS) Well, I guess I just kind of lost my head, Miss Mamie.

MAMIE:

(LAUGHS) Well, three down, two to go!

SOUND:

GUN SHOT

MAMIE:

There's four! And one more! (HESITATES) Uhh-- Oh, yeah.

MATT:

What are you stopping now for, Mamie?

MAMIE:

Well, I got some rules I go by, Marshal. One of 'em's never to fire my last shot and leave my gun empty.

MATT:

(DISAPPOINTED) Oh, I - I see. Well, that's a pretty good idea, I guess.

MAMIE:

Sorry to lose your bet for you, Marshal.

CHESTER:

(FOR MAMIE'S BENEFIT) I'm convinced! (TOO LOUD, TO MATT) Well, I guess that didn't quite--

DILLON:

(QUICKLY INTERRUPTS) Uh, Chester! Miss Mamie, I guess you're not a gambler yourself, huh?

MAMIE:

Who says so? I'll take a fair bet at even odds any day of the week and twice in Philadelphia.

MATT:

Well, in that case, I'll make you one. I've got a pretty fair gun here, or at least I thought so till I saw yours in action.

SOUND:

DURING ABOVE, MATT PLACES GUN ON BAR TOP

MAMIE:

Well, I'd say yours is every bit as good as mine.

MATT:

Well, then how about a bet? Your gun against mine on a ---- one-cut high card, huh?

MAMIE:

(HESITANT) Well, now, I - I didn't--

MATT:

'Course it's all right with me if you'd rather back out on it.

MAMIE:

Who's backing out?!

SOUND:

MAMIE PLACES GUN ON BAR TOP

MAMIE:

You got yourself a bet, Mr. Dillon. (CALLS) Finnegan! Shuffle us a deck!

FINNEGAN:

(OFF) Okay, Miss Mamie.

SOUND:

FINNEGAN'S FOOTSTEPS TO MAMIE BEHIND--

MAMIE:

If it's a bet or a fight, Mamie never backs out.

SOUND:

FINNEGAN RUFFLES CARDS AND SETS DECK ON BAR TOP

FINNEGAN:

(CLOSER) Here you are, Miss Mamie.

MAMIE:

Now. (BEAT) Who goes first, Mr. Dillon?

MATT:

Why, ladies, always.

MAMIE:

All right, if your friend Lester will cut 'em for us once.

CHESTER:

(MEEKLY) It's Chester. Chester B. Proudfoot--

MAMIE:

(OVERLAPS ABOVE) Never mind! Cut the cards!

CHESTER:

Yes, sir-- Er, ma'am.

SOUND:

CHESTER CUTS THE CARDS

MAMIE:

(SLOWLY) Now -- let's see what we've got.

SOUND:

MAMIE CUTS

MATT:

Ah, Jack of Spades. That's not bad.

MAMIE:

Plenty good, Marshal. Plenty good enough to beat anything you can--

SOUND:

MATT CUTS

MATT:

King of Diamonds.

MAMIE:

All right. I'm beat! Fair and square! You won yourself a gun.

MATT:

Ah, thank you.

SOUND: MATT PICKS UP GUN

MATT:

Here, Chester, will you take it?

CHESTER:

Yes, sir.

MATT:

(WITH EFFORT) And now the handcuffs.

MAMIE:

(EARSPLITTING) Here! No! No, stop that!

MATT:

Mamie, you're under arrest.

SOUND:

CLICK! OF HANDCUFFS

MAMIE:

(FURIOUS) Why, you--! Of all the side-winding, double-crossing, backhanded--!

MATT:

Mamie! Mamie! Now you are going to stay fastened to me until I get you in a cell, so you might as well make the best of it.

MAMIE:

Why, you--!

MATT:

And, as far as that's concerned, you'll be safer in jail than out of it, once word gets around. People here in Dodge City thought a lot of Herman Bleeker.

MAMIE:

That little sawed-off groundhog!

MATT:

That's no excuse for killing him in cold blood.

MAMIE:

(BEAT; LOW, DISBELIEF) What?!

HERMAN:

(OFF, DELIGHTED) You heard him, Mamie! You killed me!

SOUND:

CROWD REACTS

MATT:

Bleeker!

SOUND:

HERMAN'S FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

HERMAN:

(CLOSER) This is the biggest night of my whole life to hear somebody finally shut Mamie up and make her like it!

MAMIE:

The Marshal's a gentleman, you little weasel! He knows how to talk to a lady!

HERMAN:

And to hear you say how much the town thinks of me, Mr. Dillon.

MATT:

What's this all about, Herman?

HERMAN:

Well--

MAMIE:

I'll tell you what it's all about! This little grub worm ran out on me in Cincinnati three years ago! Like to broke my heart! I've been huntin' him ever since and last night I found him. I whaled the livin' daylights out of him.

MATT:

Yeah, he looks like it. But why did you bury his clothes?

MAMIE:

Mr. Dillon, would you want to be married to a man that dressed like that?

HERMAN:

She pretty near murdered me, though, Mr. Dillon. I've been up there in bed all day. Just too bruised and embarrassed to hobble downstairs.

MAMIE:

(CONCILIATORY) Ah, we had our ups and downs, Marshal -- me and Herman. You know how it is.

MATT:

Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Chester, give me the keys to the handcuffs, will ya?

SOUND:

CHESTER STEPS FORWARD

CHESTER:

Yes, sir, I got' em right here in-- (BEAT) Well, I guess they're over in the--

MATT:

(PAUSE, UNHAPPY) What's the matter, Chester?

CHESTER:

(SLOWLY) Oh, Mr. Dillon. When we were diggin' out there-- Guess I must have lost 'em.

MUSIC:

BRIDGE

SOUND:

FILING HANDCUFFS

MATT:

Chester, can't you file that thing any faster?

CHESTER:

You might just as well relax, Mr. Dillon. Took a half hour to get that one off Miss Mamie's wrist.

MATT:

Oh, all right, all right. But just hurry, will ya?

CHESTER:

I'm a-filing as fast as I can.

SOUND:

DOC'S FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

DOC:

(MERRILY) Hey! (CHUCKLES) Matt, Matt, Matt--

MATT:

What? Oh. Doc.

DOC:

Mamie gave me this bottle of Irish here to make the waitin' a little easier -- and it's Jameson's.

MATT:

(PLEASED) Oh, well, fine, Doc, fine. Uh, Chester, let that go for a minute, huh?

SOUND:

FILING STOPS

MATT:

And open it up.

CHESTER:

Yes, sir, Mr. Dillon.

SOUND:

CLINK OF BOTTLE AND GLASSES BEHIND--

MATT:

(SIGHS) Can you imagine it, boys? Little Herman Bleeker married for years to a woman like that?

DOC:

Oh, I don't want to imagine. Oh, I'd get nightmares.

SOUND:

JAMESON'S IRISH WHISKEY POURED

CHESTER:

Here you go, Mr. Dillon.

DOC:

Oh, thank you, Chester.

SOUND:

GLASS SET DOWN

CHESTER:

Doc.

DOC:

(CHUCKLES) Thank you.

SOUND:

GLASS SET DOWN

MATT:

Ah! Well, gentlemen. Here's to the weaker sex.

DOC:

Mr. Dillon --- which one is that?

MUSIC:

CURTAIN

ANNOUNCER:

GUNSMOKE, under the direction of Norman Macdonnell, stars William Conrad as Matt Dillon, U. S. Marshal. Tonight's story was specially written for GUNSMOKE by Les Crutchfield with music composed and conducted by Rex Koury. Featured in the cast were Jeanette Nolan as Mamie, with John Dehner, Ralph Moody and Byron Kane. Parley Baer is Chester, Howard McNear is Doc. Join us again next week as Matt Dillon, U. S. Marshal, fights to bring law and order out of the wild violence of the West in - GUNSMOKE.

MUSIC:

THEME TILL END

ANNOUNCER:

As colorful as a western roundup and twice the fun, that's THE GENE AUTRY SHOW which comes your way every Saturday evening over CBS radio. It's one of radio's most distinctive programs, flavored to taste with songs of the sagebrush and melodies of the mesquite country. THE GENE AUTRY SHOW is thirty minutes you'll enjoy. Packed full of comedy, songs and the genial personality of the one and only Gene Autry. The whole Melody Ranch gang is on hand to entertain you tomorrow night, every Saturday night. So tune in THE GENE AUTRY SHOW and hit the pleasure trail over most of these same CBS stations.

Clancy Kissel speaking. And remember BROADWAY IS MY BEAT brings you startling mysteries Saturday nights on the CBS Radio Network.